Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

4 Bumps

Worried about my daughter's social life ( teen mom ) ...

( yeah i know that might sound a little crazy)

My daughter has always been a good kid, until she was about 14. We moved to a new town and she started acting out... this went on for almost a year.

At 15 she ended up getting pregnant, and because of her age and the way she was acting I was sure I would be raising this baby....

BUT, things have changed, when she had my grandaughter she pretty much grew up in that moment. She is an AMAZING mother!!!

We let her do online learning instead of going back to school, so she could be with the baby, during the day not only would she take wonderful care of her daughter, but she would also clean the entire house ( even pick up after her brother), and would make dinner, pretty much every night, then she would do her school work online at night time while the baby was asleep. She graduated 2 weeks before she turned 17. She even started her own craft buisness ( which I am sure alot of you would know, that really isnt a career, but she is making around $600-$700 / month... which she spends all on the baby, with the exceptions of SOMETIMES buying herself a new outfit or trying to give us some ( we put it back into grandaughters piggybank) ....

In a few months when she turns 18 she will be going to "beauty school" to become a beautician ( taking adult classes which are like 4 hours a day, 3 days a week) ......

Now my "problem" is that, I am actually worried about my daughter's social life. I am not talking about me wanting her to go out and party or whatever, but she NEVER goes anywhere without her daughter, the only time she sees friends is if they come over to visit or if they go out to lunch or a store ( in which she always takes GD) , and for the most part she really has no friends her age, maybe 1 or 2, everyone else she "hangs" out with are her aunts and other older family members.

I am not complaining because I think she is an outstanding mother and person and is doing ALOT better than most mothers that are double her age, but I am just worried that she will reach a certain point and have that "want" to go out and spend time with friends and such, does anyone know what I mean ???

I have tried to talk to her about this telling her I will watch the baby and maybe she should go out with friends alone every once in awhile, but she refuses and says her time "alone" will be while she is in school, and that, that would be enough for her......

Do you think this is something to worry about ????

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 11:24 PM on Jul. 7, 2012 in Parenting Debate

Answers (13)
  • Absolutely not! Be thankful, seriously!
    My neighbors daughter had a beautiful baby girl at the young age of 16. Daughter is 17 now and ALWAYS leaves her baby home with grandma to go out and party! Complete opposite of your daughter. She quit school and sleeps during the day. Her mom enables all this and complains about it.
    You're daughter is focused on becoming a good mom and provider for her daughter. She'll make friends when the time is right.
    PMSMom10

    Answer by PMSMom10 at 11:32 PM on Jul. 7, 2012

  • I would not be worried. She is doing a great job, graduating, taking care of her daughter, goal to go to school, and finding time to still socialize, but she knows whats important in her life now.
    virginiamama71

    Answer by virginiamama71 at 11:50 PM on Jul. 7, 2012

  • Thanks :) ... I guess I am just worried because i think she is so busy trying to be perfect and to show everybody that she can be a great mom, that is forgetting that she is aloud to have fun too ...
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 11:54 PM on Jul. 7, 2012

  • Your daughter sounds like a bright, wonderful young woman. Maybe you can encourage her to take her baby to the pool or the library where she might meet other moms. She may have outgrown her old party crowd; perhaps she'll make some new friends in beauty school. But her baby will grow up so fast, let her enjoy her daughter. If you want to do something special for her, offer to watch the baby while she goes and gets her hair done or has a pedicure, sees a movie, whatever she's into.
    Ballad

    Answer by Ballad at 11:55 PM on Jul. 7, 2012

  • I wouldn;t worry too much- she is going to meet people in cosmetology school! *most people who go are young ;)
    charlotsomtimes

    Answer by charlotsomtimes at 12:08 AM on Jul. 8, 2012

  • Definitely not! I am just like your daughter...I have no desire to be away from my daughter. She is 6 now and it has been that way from the beginning...if I go somewhere, she does too. "Fun" for me changed when I became a mom and what I was into before I just wasn't anymore. I've had people tell me it's not natural and that I would resent my daughter for "taking over my life," but it certainly has not happened yet! :-)

    I would just keep letting her know that you are there to watch her daughter if/when she needs/wants you to.
    AllAboutKeeley

    Answer by AllAboutKeeley at 1:17 AM on Jul. 8, 2012

  • Being a mom at a very early age has forced her to grow up really fast. She may find that her peers are not as mature as she is right now. Going to Beauty School she will meet people older and maybe just as mature as she is. It may take a while for her to find her niche of friends.
    robinkane

    Answer by robinkane at 7:19 AM on Jul. 8, 2012

  • I wouldn't worry, she seems to have her priorities straight! But if you're concerned talk to her about it and let her know that of sometimes she wants to go out with her friends, or on a date, you're willing to babysit.

    Sharon
    momto2boys973

    Answer by momto2boys973 at 10:16 AM on Jul. 8, 2012

  • No I don't. I will bet that she will make friends at beauty school and then ate work. She is fine.
    Dardenella

    Answer by Dardenella at 2:50 PM on Jul. 8, 2012

  • No she is right she has alot to do right now she has the rest of her life to do all of that. She needs to focus on her baby and their future.
    booklover545

    Answer by booklover545 at 7:16 PM on Jul. 11, 2012

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.