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How to make other peoples kids behave without being a total b****?

I can't stand babysitting my son's friends. I'm doing it to be nice though because i'm sure she would do the same if i needed someone. They are so wild when they get together and i feel guilty making them behave..kinda like i'm being really mean! It really makes me sick to my stomach being mean and yelling because i NEVER have to say a word to my son when its just us. I don't want these kids to go home and say "she was really mean to us.." They don't listen though and they run wild and jump on furniture. My son never does this..i see a side of him i never see when he is with them and certainly hope he does not act like this at their home. I've told him that he is the leader when they come over and its his responsibility to tell them what is not allowed..and he will be in trouble when they go home if i have to get on to them for not letting them know because he knows the rules. Should i punish him later and let them act like idiots and ignore it because i've already said something more than once or should i continue to lose my mind by screaming and chasing after them???? I don't know why i put myself in these situations

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shay1130

Asked by shay1130 at 1:45 PM on Jul. 12, 2012 in General Parenting

Level 27 (32,809 Credits)
Answers (20)
  • I would just say the rules in our house are---- and if everyone behaves we will have........
    booklover545

    Answer by booklover545 at 9:35 PM on Jul. 12, 2012

  • Perfect opening to talk to their parents..."She was mean!" and if they ask why, you can explain to them what was going on. Try not to scream and yell, unless they are that loud they wouldn't be able to hear you otherwise.
    hopeandglory53

    Answer by hopeandglory53 at 5:04 PM on Jul. 12, 2012

  • Make them play outside when they come over.
    ILovemyPaulie

    Answer by ILovemyPaulie at 4:41 PM on Jul. 12, 2012

  • Kids need structure & discipline. Who cares if they think you're mean or a b*^%ch? You're their caregiver, not their friend. I personally don't care if they like me, but they damn well better respect me, esp. in my own home. Lay down the law. If they don't like it, tough! That being said, I hope you are able to find outside activities for them to do to blow off all that energy they have. :)
    mrsmom110

    Answer by mrsmom110 at 3:57 PM on Jul. 12, 2012

  • BTW I use the same punishments for my friends kids in my home as I do my own and it goes the same way on the other side.
    coala

    Answer by coala at 3:52 PM on Jul. 12, 2012

  • You need to talk to your friend and find out what kinds of punishments she finds acceptable. I have a friend who's son gets rambunctious at my house as well. He has been put in his place and I had to punish him for something and then when his mom picked him up he got punished a second time b/c he knew better than to do what he did especially at another persons home.

    Find out what is acceptable and go from there, but not disciplining is not the way to go. Good luck!!
    coala

    Answer by coala at 3:50 PM on Jul. 12, 2012

  • Telling your son you will punish him if they misbehave isn't fair. Even if he tells them the rules and that they can't do something, that doesn't mean they'll listen to him any more than they listen to you. You need to establish your authority.

    Personally, when I babysit, the kids I sit are subject to the same rules as mine - and my friends know that. Same goes when my kids are being watched by someone else - they're subject to that person's rules, whether I would have that same rule or not. If your concerned about the parents having an issue, then just tell them you need to know what discipline methods they are comfortable with you using. If they tell you they don't want you disciplining or they don't like your rules, then you tell them that they need to find another sitter. You should not have to tolerate that kind of behavior in your home, and if the parents won't back you up, then they need to go elsewhere.
    wendythewriter

    Answer by wendythewriter at 3:05 PM on Jul. 12, 2012

  • First, I would tell the parents how their children are behaving and that I cannot and will not any longer tolerate their disrespect for my home and my rules. I would then ask them for their suggestions as to a solution to this problem. Hopefully, that would include their taking an active role in disciplining their own children. If that doesn't happen, you can either tell them you will no longer watch them or that they will from this time forward obey your rules or they will suffer the same consequences as your own child does. If they choose to no longer allow you to watch them, then so be it. You cannot have other children coming into your own home and destroying your authority and you property. If it hasn't already, it will undermine your authority with your own child and that is not easily re-established. Honesty is the best policy, and you start by being honest with the parents as in "your kids are brats!"
    NannyB.

    Answer by NannyB. at 2:38 PM on Jul. 12, 2012

  • the next time they come over, you tell them what the rules are. you tell them the consequences for breaking the rules. Then start off their time there by taking them outside and doing something active. play basketball, chase each other, go to the park so they can climb the toys there. give them something fun to do that is active and doesn't break the rules.

    zetajen

    Answer by zetajen at 2:25 PM on Jul. 12, 2012

  • I always tell the wild children that come to my house "You may act like that at home but at my house we have rules and we don't behave that way." I sure will put them in time out kicking and screaming. Your house, your the boss.
    txnmomof4

    Answer by txnmomof4 at 2:23 PM on Jul. 12, 2012

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