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How can I get my 3.5 year old to poop on the potty? She pees on the potty fine but she had a bad experience with the poopy hurting and now thinks it will hurt all the time. I'm going on 6 months of cleaning out her panties....At my ropes end..

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Asked by Maureen11757 at 8:44 PM on Jul. 21, 2008 in Preschoolers (3-4)

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Answers (8)
  • My son was the same way. What finally worked for me was to put a candy dish on the sink, filled it with one bag of individually wrapped lifesavers. He only got one if he pooped in the potty, after washing and flushing too. By the time the candy dish was empty he never had an accident again. I know a lot of mom's don't go for the candy bribe, but it worked for him when all else failed.

    Answer by Slinkee at 8:50 PM on Jul. 21, 2008

  • My daughter was pretty predictable about when she had to go. So we'd sit there reading potty books, elmo books, anything to keep her on there. I used to ask her where her poops were and if she could show them to me. Gross I know, but what ever it takes, right? Also, her fav candy m&ms finally did the trick. I bought a big bag and I promised her them when she pooped on the potty. Ahh the magic of m&ms... they worked like a charm! I would give her one of each color and when she wanted more I told her she'd have to wait until she went poopies on the potty again. Don't give up!!!

    Answer by allord at 8:52 PM on Jul. 21, 2008

  • Stop cleaning out her underwear and make HER clean herself up when she poops herself . @ 3 1/2 she is capable of cleaning herself up and who like sitting in their own crap she'll figure it out eventually or will go to school smelling like doodoo and be made fun of and will figure it out then (sounds mean but its the God's honest truth)

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:59 PM on Jul. 21, 2008

  • Not trying to be judgmental or anything but that sounds kind of harsh! My 4-year-old can barely keep the skid marks out of his drawers I can't imagine making him clean an accident!!

    Answer by Slinkee at 9:05 PM on Jul. 21, 2008

  • I think at this point it's not an issue of potty training but discipline. If I were you, I'd tell her she's much too grown up to be pooping in her pants and from now on when it happens you'll have to change her and clean her up outside with the garden hose because that's how big people who poop their pants are dealt with. This isn't something just meant to be mean, it's meant to show her that she is in error, and to make her own decision about whether or not to poop in her pants and accept the new consequences. How cold it is outside the first time it happens will probably be a good indicator of how successful this will be, obviously the colder and more uncomfortable the process, the better it will work to change her mind about using the potty.

    Answer by jessica4983 at 9:14 PM on Jul. 21, 2008

  • Some of these answers are really mean! I can't believe people think it is a matter of discipline. My daughter was sooo scared of pooping on the potty also, she never did it in her pants but she would sit on the potty for a good hour crying before she would go. You just need to take it slow, use a few bribes if you need to and explain to her that it won't hurt anymore if she poops often enough on the potty and gets it out before it gets to big to make her butt hurt when it does come out. When my daughter went through that stage it only lasted a month or two and now she is fine! Please don't humiliate her in the front yard or at school.. there are better ways to do it. It is most likely a phase that will pass shortly. Good luck momma~

    Answer by TilmannsGirl at 12:04 AM on Jul. 22, 2008

  • Where does she pee, on the little training potty or big potty? If you don't yet have a Dora (or something else cute) potty seat to go on the big potty, maybe get one and make a big deal out of it, and just give her time.

    Do not use the garden hose (embarassment she will never forget).


    Answer by TXdanielly at 12:53 AM on Jul. 22, 2008

  • my grandbaby is 3 she also had a hurting experience ive found that putting her on the potty and sitting on the floor talking to her and reasuring her that im there to help has made her feel at ease do not use any kind of disapline technique she already thinks its going to hurt be gentle and patient reward her for giving it a try i know its a hassle believe me you will get more progress with praise than you will with disapline she might need to use miralax to soften her stools dont use the 17 grams tho ive found that makes the babys poop to loose i used only half on my granddaughter and it made her more comfortable its not an instant cure just some advice but really dont chastise the baby you will never make any progress with that approach lots of luck

    Answer by sissygrandma at 12:08 PM on Jul. 23, 2008

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