Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Would you stay with your hubby if ? Would you trust him?

If your hubby had a bad past like I recently found out he would party too much ... have sex with girls he didnt even know and didnt use protection? if you found out that he had a threesome with two lesbians? which one of the girls turned out to be that you've known her your whole life .... but she still said she respected you and your husband ? and that it was only a one time thing ? I REALLY NEED OPINIONS I HONESTLY DONT KNOW WHAT TO DOO ANYMORE !!!! WE HAVE 2 BABIES A 22 MON. OLD AND A 5 WEEK OLD .... THIS JUST KEEPS BOTHERING ME AND I FEEL LIKE I CANT TRUST HIM ANYMORE.... I EVEN BECAME JEALOUS AFTER ALL THIS... TO THE POINT THAT I DONT WANT HIM TALKING TO ANY OTHER GIRLS...BESIDES FAMILY...AND I STARTED THINKING HE LIKES OTHER PEOPLE OR FINDS EVERYONE BETTER THAN ME =( PLEASE HELP ME=(

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 10:25 PM on Feb. 2, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (8)
  • Oh girl! I think I would leave IF this was during marriage/togetherness. BECAUSE your kids don't need to see you in that much pain. TRUST ME they can sense all that, being that young they need your undivided LOVE, ATTENTION, and AFFECTION.
    If it was all prior to and things have moved on, I would just see a counsler for your insecurity.

    Answer by racingmomma at 10:31 PM on Feb. 2, 2009

  • if they are lesbians I don't think you have much to worry about

    Answer by admckenzie at 10:39 PM on Feb. 2, 2009

  • if it's the past i would leave it there. i made sure that i didn't ask and i didn't tell my husband what his past was cause oh man can i end up feeling like you and frankly i wouldn't be able to handle it BUT i wouldn't leave my husband over it. especially if it is all in the past. everyone deserves to have one and they deserve a second chance to make the future happy with you.

    Answer by melody77 at 11:03 PM on Feb. 2, 2009

  • If they were actual lesbians they wouldn't have had a threesome with a MAN...

    I don't know. I think I would be outta there. I'd have a problem with not being the #1 priority in my SO's life, especially being the mother of his children.

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:08 PM on Feb. 2, 2009

  • Oh, right...I didn't really get the in-the-past gist of it all...
    Well, if it's all over now, and he's been with no one but you since you've been together, I don't see any reason to fret.

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:10 PM on Feb. 2, 2009

  • If it was in the past, before you were together, I would try to let it go. I did a lot of things in my past that I am definately not proud of, but that does not mean that I would ever do those things now. I am happily married with children and those thoughts never cross my mind. So it is absolutely possible for people to change. If this was while you were together, that would definately be a different story!

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:06 AM on Feb. 3, 2009

  • This is what happens when you have babies with men you don't know. You don't know them, you don't know about their past. So when you find out you can't deal with it. Sure people can change but their past made them who they are today.

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:38 AM on Feb. 3, 2009

  • But if this was BEFORE you, then you shouldn't be too upset. Everyone is allowed to make mistakes and bad decisions. Make sure he gets tested for STDs (just for a peace of mind) and if the woman involved with the 3some has made it clear it was a one time thing and she is respectful of you and your marriage, then it sounds like she just made a bad decision one night too. If he is a good husband and father NOW, then forget the past and focus on what makes you a family....LOVE!

    Answer by ozarkgirl3 at 4:09 PM on Feb. 3, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.