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Would you be mad if your husband told you were the first girl he had sex with and stuck to the story for over five years. and then tod you you weren't this many years later?

So my husband just told me after we've been together for over five years that I'm not the first girl he had sex with. I can't figure out why he lied to me about it. it was before me and all. So if he told me way back then I wouldn't have been mad. But to lie about all these years hurts. I'm not sure how I should feel or what I should do?

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 11:17 PM on Feb. 2, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (5)
  • i would feel the same. he should of never told you. what you didn't know wouldn't of hurt you. or he should of just told you from the start and really how can you really know what he just told you really is the truth, right? with time you'll get over it. right now it's hard i'm sure.
    melody77

    Answer by melody77 at 11:25 PM on Feb. 2, 2009

  • Im sorry but I would be very angry at him, he lied about his past and now expects you to accept him for his lies?!? I dont think so, I dont have any advise as to how to go about this, but I would be very mad, so if you feel that way I think its normal...It makes me wonder what else is he lying about?
    MaiasMommy619

    Answer by MaiasMommy619 at 1:24 AM on Feb. 3, 2009

  • I'd probably have to ask him if he was as bad in bed with the other girl as he was with you at first. Then I'd smile sweetly while he pondered that.

    But yeah, I'd be pissed. Not relationship ending pissed, but punish him with silence for 2 days pissed. The move on. It doesn't make the past 5 years a lie or anything stupidly melodramatic. As we women like to say so often, sex isn't the end-all, be-all of a relationship and the lie was about something that happened before you were on the scene.
    Avarah

    Answer by Avarah at 1:55 AM on Feb. 3, 2009

  • I wouldn't worry about it. You were the one he brought home. Not the one he got his experience with.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:30 AM on Feb. 3, 2009

  • Did you ask why he didn't tell you? Maybe it was a bad experiance for him and he totally regretted it. Maybe he was "pushed" into doing it (Although not common it does happen...my DH first time was when he was 9 and a 13 year old girl basically raped him) So maybe in his head you really were the "first" girl he made love too. I can see why you would be upset, but please, don't punish him. It was obviously a mistake on his part and he wanted to be honest with you (even if it took some time for him to let you know) so you must know that you mean a lot to him. Making love happens in the heart, not in the bed. Don't let it bother you anymore. And maybe give him a wild night to show him that no matter if you were the first, you are definitly going to be the last! LOL
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:53 PM on Feb. 3, 2009

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