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A guy who loses his mother...

I was dating this guy for 6 years off & on, mostly on, we were never broken up for more than 2 months (I think that's what our problem was, if we actually 'broke' up it could have worked, we got back together, it was good a month, than it went right back to the way it was)... His mom died a massive heart attack, she was 60, it was very sudden as her husband found her dead on the floor. Maybe irreleavant, but the lady happened to be my best friend, I was grieving. I have never really seen my ex shed tears except when he told me about it, and at the funeral and viewing. His patience seemed to dimish with me (I seemed more bitchy, he seemd more irritated after her death). WE had our problems, but they were simple, mostly about money, stuff that could have been fixed. I know his mom wanted us to get married. My ex seems to have this bottled up inside, because I haven't seen him grieve except his temper shorter, and patience seeming to be none. His brother, also was in a 2 1/2 year realtionship broke up with his girlfriend a month after my ex and I broke up, they were living together as well.. He's also the type to keep stuff bottled up inside.. I guess my question is- If our relationship really fell apart because of his mom dying, grief etc. or lack there of because it's bottled up, is there hope for us in the future? How long does it take for a guy to overcome this , if they ever.. He broke up with me about 2 months after she died.

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 8:29 PM on Aug. 7, 2012 in Relationships

Answers (17)
  • I guess he is the definition of a "momma's boy".

    Answer by robinkane at 8:32 PM on Aug. 7, 2012

  • How long ago did this all happen? It's normal to grieve the loss of a parent, and men are notorious for bottling their emotions. From what you've said, it doesn't sound like this is the reason you're no longer together. Things weren't working out before she died, and it sounds like you're blaming her death on it truly being over.

    Answer by Ginger0104 at 8:40 PM on Aug. 7, 2012

  • Honestly, it sounds like you had issues prior to his mother's passing so, it's not her death that is the cause.

    Answer by 3libras at 8:41 PM on Aug. 7, 2012

  • We had NORMAL relationship problems.. I feel his mom dying pushed him over the edge and he lost his patience, is what I Was trying to explain

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 8:43 PM on Aug. 7, 2012

  • Normal relationships don't break up over and over.

    Answer by Ginger0104 at 8:50 PM on Aug. 7, 2012

  • What ginger0104

    Answer by adnilm at 8:55 PM on Aug. 7, 2012

  • He's a very different cat. I don't know how to explain it.. When he gets angry it just goes boom.. then when he isn't angry anymore he starts to change his mind.. Iv'e been patient.

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 8:58 PM on Aug. 7, 2012

  • You've tried over and over for six years. How many more years are you willing to devote to trying? I'd move on.

    Answer by admckenzie at 9:05 PM on Aug. 7, 2012

  • Isn't it different if you have a kid together? She's never officially lived with us.. I think that would have helped, solve ALL the issues with money etc.

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 9:10 PM on Aug. 7, 2012

  • Time to move on. Healthy relationships don't break up over and over. Furthermore, do you really want to be with someone who "Goes boom"? Is that what you want your children to witness and to replicate?

    Answer by theMOMmission at 9:10 PM on Aug. 7, 2012

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