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Help end this arguement with my hubby!

Ok so my husband is a Marine and we used to be really close to a guy that is in his shop, along with his family. We used to hang out every weekend. Well after about 8 months they just kinda stopped inviting us over. Then 3 months later they invited us to their daughter's 1st b-day and we went, brought a present and visited. That was a year ago and they haven't invited us back..... until now! Guess what the occassion is! Yea her 2nd b-day. My husband thinks we should go because it would be rude not to. I think we should kindly tell them I don't feel comfortable coming because we haven't hung out in over a year but that if they ever do want to get together we'd love to. This is a never ending arguement and I am very stubborn. Am I wrong? Should I just suck it up? I just don't like feeling like I'm being used for a gift, you know?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 1:04 PM on Feb. 4, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (12)
  • Go if you want to, if you dont tell your dh he can go and tell them youre home sick or something.

    Answer by gemgem at 1:06 PM on Feb. 4, 2009

  • i agree with you.

    Answer by jodi205 at 1:12 PM on Feb. 4, 2009

  • to me it sounds like there using you in a way i would do what you said you haven't hung out with them for a year they only invite you to the bday partys kinda rude n a way

    Answer by butterscotch297 at 1:13 PM on Feb. 4, 2009

  • Couple of questions to help answer...Did you send an invite to your kids b-day to them after they invited you? If you did and they didn't make it, then I think you are justified in not going. But, I'm sure you know how hectic it can be being a military wife/mom and maybe they really didn't DO anything the past year. I'm sure they did hubby/wife/kid things, but maybe they didn't do anything they wanted to include others in. I'm in a similar situation (i've invited several friends to my sons' b-days, playdates,etc and no one comes or invites us) so those people, I don't bother contacting anymore. But, i do have friends that keep wanting us to hang out, but our schedules never seem to match up. And if they invited you, i'm sure they want to see you guys. Maybe just go to find out whats been happening in their lives the past year and make your decision after. You don't have to spend a lot on the gift, either, just in case.

    Answer by ozarkgirl3 at 1:13 PM on Feb. 4, 2009

  • I'm with you OP.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:14 PM on Feb. 4, 2009

  • Why do you think they stopped inviting you? Have you guys invited them too? I would just go to not be rude; just keep your distance.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:14 PM on Feb. 4, 2009

  • What happened that they stopped inviting us over was this. There were a bunch of us that went every weekend. Pretty much all of the families from my hubby's shop. Well the female marine and her husband starting coming after the rest of us had already been doing the weekend thing for months. They came for probably 2 or 3 months straight and it was great! We had alot of fun. Well we were playing a game one night and the female marine got a text and she chuckled and showed it ot her husband and he chuckled. She didn't explain what it was and it was obviously an inside joke that none of us would have gotten anyway. No one else was offended but the wife that invited us. She told everyone that they weren't invited back. I told her that seemed like a petty reason to uninvite someone and she said there are no secrets allowed in her house. That was the ned of the convo, after that she didn't invite us back either.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:21 PM on Feb. 4, 2009

  • 'they' as in the female marine and her husband.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:22 PM on Feb. 4, 2009

  • i say dont go. Ive had that situation before. it really makes you feel like your just being invited to bring a gift. or if you do go dont bring a present??

    Answer by MomCakes at 1:35 PM on Feb. 4, 2009

  • I agree with you. You could go, but not take a gift?! If she didn't want secrets in her house, she should just not invite the ones that caused the trouble to begin with. Especially if that couple was the last one to join the group. What she did is tacky, and what she does now it worse. Only inviting people to get presents. Tsk, tsk.

    Answer by Buffie95 at 1:38 PM on Feb. 4, 2009

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