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Do your sons wish they were girls?

I have a 4 1/2 year old son that has wished he was a girl for quite a while now. I ask him why he wants to be a girl and he says because girls are so beautiful. He tries to look through my makeup or try on my shoes when I'm getting ready. He's always been into singing and dancing. He likes to pretend he's Snow White and Cinderella by wearing a scarf around his waist and pretending it is a tutu.

His father and I have no problems with he's behavior. Our rule has been not to encourage it OR discourage it either. If our son tells us he's gay one day, that'll be fine with us. Will love him, of course.

What do you think? Is this a "phase"? Do a lot of boys go through it?


Asked by Anonymous at 1:19 PM on Feb. 4, 2009 in General Parenting

This question is closed.
Answers (6)
  • I don't think it's that unusual... he may grow up straight as a toothpick or gay as a picnic basket. :) I think that you're probably his #1, so wanting to be like mommy seems pretty natural. Plus, let's face it, girls get to wear prettier colors and flowers and stuff. C'mon, guys like pastels and flowers too! They're just conditioned to go for reds and blues and bolder shades. Girls are expected to be flowers, and boys are expected to be rocks. Though sometimes I wanna be the rock, and I know my husband sometimes wants to be the flower! It's nice the two of you are letting him be himself. I think it's important that we don't try to warp their wonderful little personalities into what we want them to be... so good job!

    Answer by sfwilson at 1:33 PM on Feb. 4, 2009

  • sometimes i do i think that and hes fourteen lol

    Answer by jodi205 at 1:19 PM on Feb. 4, 2009

  • I have 2 sons, and they have occasionally asked me about wearing make-up, nail polish, etc. I don't think it really means that he is or might be gay, I think it's just curiosity b/c they're being exposed to it. I'm a single mom, so my kids only have me to look to. If my sons are gay, so what. But I really think it's...I don't know if phase is the right word, but I think it's probably normal.

    Answer by tropicalmama at 1:29 PM on Feb. 4, 2009

  • yeah my 3 yr old boy mainly play with girls and wrestles (plays rough) with boys so all his good friends at school and at home are girls, he will play the princess as often as the dragon. he really really wanted a pink coat he saw, i couldnt let him because of the guff i would get for it but if we lived in the middle of nowhere i wouldnt have cared... i know the lil boy who lives behind me wanted a pink party like he had seen a girl have for his b0day when he turned 2... he is all boy... they just dont understand everything yet, and if they do end up being gay, who cares right!!

    Answer by AmaliaD at 2:05 PM on Feb. 4, 2009

  • I have to boys. But they don't act girlie by any means. I'm sure it is just a phase, then maybe he will grow out of. I agree with the comment by "sfwilson". It's probably just that your so important in his life.

    Answer by BooHooMommy at 2:08 PM on Feb. 4, 2009

  • I would not borrow trouble I think it is natural and a phase. My BFF had a 4 yr old that wore his older sisters Tinker Bell costume an entire summer...and now he is Mr. Jock.

    Answer by salexander at 12:32 PM on Feb. 5, 2009