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2 Bumps

Why do people make up stories about their lives that aren't true??

Theres a woman I work with who is constantly telling lies about things going on in he life. Her husand cheated on her a few years back, and left her. He remarried the new woman and they have a couple kids together. Awful story, I know. But the more time that goes on, the more I feel bad for him and the new wife because the woman I work with (the ex wife) gets more and more insane with the situation. She lies about everything. From personal details shes "uncovered" about the new wife, to how her and her ex "talk all the time" and "meet up for lunch" and how he's "still in love with her and going to leave the new wife to get back with her". At first I believed some of it, but then her stories started not making sence. I've gone to lunch with her several times, then the next day she'll be talking about how she had such a "great time at lunch with my ex yesturday"....I'm surely not her ex. And she can't seem to decide who he's leaving his new wife for. First it was for her, then for one of her friends, then her again, then some lady she's never met...only heard of, now its back to her again. The weird part is my sister work with the guy. He is very happy with his wife now and isn't planning to leave her at all.
But, my sister also found out that this crazy behavior was happening while they were married too. They were married for a very short period of time, didn't have any kids or anything live that. But my co-worker makes it out like they were married for 50 years and this new wife is a "phase" he's gotten over or something.
I used to ignore it, but now I'm so irritated by the DAILY drama with this woman and her ex and the new wife. Its very hard fr me to keep my mouth shut most of the time. I know he did her wrog when he cheated. I felt really bad for her and I guess asked for the drama at first because I became her "shoulder to cry on". But now that I'm discovering all the lies and nonsence...I'm done with it and really want to go off on her!

Why do people feel the need to lie like this, and what do I do about her??

Answer Question
 
R3B3CCA

Asked by R3B3CCA at 1:16 PM on Aug. 14, 2012 in Relationships

Level 4 (49 Credits)
Answers (24)
  • Because they're unhappy with their lives, they feel the need to impress/compete with others, they value other's opinions, they have low self esteem, they like the attention.........
    maecntpntz219

    Answer by maecntpntz219 at 1:20 PM on Aug. 14, 2012

  • Tell her she needs to move on and part of that would be to stop talking and obsessing about what he does. And tell her that in helping her you are not going to listen to any of her conversations about him anymore. If she starts again just say NO.
    meooma

    Answer by meooma at 1:21 PM on Aug. 14, 2012

  • They need the attention
    Alisim

    Answer by Alisim at 1:21 PM on Aug. 14, 2012

  • and change the subject.
    meooma

    Answer by meooma at 1:21 PM on Aug. 14, 2012

  • I don't "make up" stories and lie about things but I have written kind of like fantasy type stories in which I am the hero or have lots of admirers or even where I am the Queen or Princess of a far away kingdom and find my prince charming. Lame I know lol but in some small way it helps to escape reality and makes me feel special even if its not real. Maybe in some way this woman is trying to make herself feel special or she is seeking attention though she is just going about it the wrong way. That's my opinion anyway. You never really know what is going on in someones life until you have walked in their shoes.
    Heavensonfire

    Answer by Heavensonfire at 1:23 PM on Aug. 14, 2012

  • I just wouldn't interact with her. It's her life and it affects your life in no way whatsoever. You don't even need to deal with this. Who cares if she's lying. It's her deal. But this is just my thinking of these types of people.
    Beeyatch80

    Answer by Beeyatch80 at 1:30 PM on Aug. 14, 2012

  • My aunt does the same thing. She has metal illness issues. She also likes the attention and pity
    butterflyblue19

    Answer by butterflyblue19 at 1:33 PM on Aug. 14, 2012

  • I seriously think you must work with my husbands ex! LOL She does that kind of stuff...makes up stories about me, and my husband, and our family, and tries to convince everyone that he's her "best friend" and they still talk all the time/meet up/etc. But in reality she prank calls him all the time just so she can hear his voice then hangs up, because she knows he wont have anything to do with her. Its really sad. She even found me on here, and trys to make it out to you ladies that he's a total scumbag screwing around on me all the time...then the next post is about him leaving me for her...then the next post is her pretending shes me and trying to make up problems in my marriage... then its back to pretending shes someone he works with that he's trying to screw...and on and on. I dont know why she does it either. If she thinks I'll see and and be like "oh that must be about my DH...I'm leaving him now!" Or if (cont)
    mlmkjw

    Answer by mlmkjw at 1:35 PM on Aug. 14, 2012

  • (cont) she just has to make up what she wants but know wont happen....who knows.

    My advice... The next time she runs a story you know is BS, call her out on it. Then tell her you're done feeling sorry for her, ad then bein lied to your face about the situation. You want to be left out of it from this point on. Because if she is that much like my husbands ex, its not going to stop. You're gona have to learn to pull yourself out of the drama, and ignore it.
    But dont be suprised if YOU become the focus of her new lies. You may be the next woman her ex is screwing! Never know!
    mlmkjw

    Answer by mlmkjw at 1:39 PM on Aug. 14, 2012

  • Heavensonfire: I dont mean making up stories like that. I mean making up those stories, then actually trying to pass them off as real. She told me last month that she was loaning him money for his divorce attorney, and that they (her and her ex) were meeting with the attorney the next day to discuss him divorcing the new wife to get back together with her etc. I knew it was all bologna, but what makes it better was the next day was a saturday, no attorneys are open. AND he was out of town with the new wife and their family that weekend. She (the new wife) has a bunch of pics on her facebook from their vacation!! You know, the one they took over 4 hours away, that he must have left to come back to meet an attorney with his ex wife then drove the 4 hours back without the wife noticeing he was gone. And then my co-worker came back on monday tell me all about "what the attorney told them" .
    R3B3CCA

    Comment by R3B3CCA (original poster) at 1:51 PM on Aug. 14, 2012

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