Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

3 Bumps

Teacher possibly on drugs?

My son will be starting third grade next week. I have recently went to the school for meet your teacher. I was really shocked to find out who it was. Unfortunately I know her. Was friends a long time ago. She got into drugs and partying and we ceased to be friends. She was nice and polite but I have this picture of running into her before and the things she was doing made me sick. I haven't seen her in 5 years before now.I am just worried that she may still be using drugs. Is there anything I can do? Should I request a new teacher?

Answer Question
 
laneyt

Asked by laneyt at 11:18 AM on Aug. 17, 2012 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

Level 2 (5 Credits)
Answers (13)
  • I'd request a new teacher. You can't "still have those images" and possibly ruin this person's career for something that used to be. If it bothers you, change. That's not fair.
    m-avi

    Answer by m-avi at 11:23 AM on Aug. 17, 2012

  • I know our school does drug testing, and maybe she has cleaned up her act, but I think it would be in the best interest of your kiddo to switch classes, you don't need to go in to her past, just tell them you all used to be friends and it ended poorly, and you feel it would be best for your child to have another teacher,

    Now that being said,, please don't go telling other parents about what she 'used" to do,, she could have had problems and overcome them, so this isn't anyone elses business.
    kimigogo

    Answer by kimigogo at 11:25 AM on Aug. 17, 2012

  • 5 years is a long time and what we did when we were young is not what we would do now. If you are that uncomfortable request a change.


    BTW


    welcome to cafemom

    DJDNY

    Answer by DJDNY at 11:26 AM on Aug. 17, 2012

  • I am not trying to ruin anyones career. For all I know she is clean. I know what she used and it is a nasty evil drug. She was on meth. She hid it really well for alot of years before anyone started noticing. She wasn't all that young. 5 years ago she was 35. She left her husband and kids and slept with the dealer for her drugs. I have no intention of telling the other parents. I don't like to start crap or gossip not my thing. That is why I am on here. No names mentioned just trying to figure it out on my own with a little anonymous advice.
    laneyt

    Comment by laneyt (original poster) at 11:37 AM on Aug. 17, 2012

  • Well I am guessing she got her act together,, have you thought about meeting her for coffee and expressing your concern? I am kind of up front so I would just say Mary, I know you had a drug problem in the past, how are you doing now? I would also allieviate her fear that you will gossip about it,, maybe it would help you and her,,
    Welcome to Cafe Mom,, I am wondering how you found answers? Just randomly polling, it seems that now that answers is so hidden, I don't think I would have been able to find it. LOL
    kimigogo

    Answer by kimigogo at 11:43 AM on Aug. 17, 2012

  • OMG,don't be going to her superiors and saying this stuff. Imagine getting her fired for no reason at all.
    If you're concerned,bring this issue up to her ALONE
    butterflyblue19

    Answer by butterflyblue19 at 11:47 AM on Aug. 17, 2012

  • What excuse are you going to use for wanting a new teacher? You can't say because she was a drug addict the last time I saw her
    butterflyblue19

    Answer by butterflyblue19 at 11:57 AM on Aug. 17, 2012

  • the past is the past, you ran with her so if you go talking about it your going to look silly. You can request a new teacher but in the end, she may end up being the best teacher your child could ever have. People change, you did after all - when you stopped hanging around her. Should we feel you have no business being around kids because you were her friend when she did this stuff?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:57 AM on Aug. 17, 2012

  • If she was still using meth, after 5 years, she would not be able to concentrate and focus on working. She would be a pock marked tweaker and everyone would know simply by looking at her. We all have the potential to change; at any point in our life: there is no magic age for that.


    Personally I'd leave it alone unless and until you have a clear indication that she is having a problem teaching the class. I do hope you intend to keep all this past personal knowledge of her to yourself. Nothing can destroy a persons reputation faster than gossip.  Remember we've all done things we wouldn't want the world to know about.

    meooma

    Answer by meooma at 11:59 AM on Aug. 17, 2012

  • meooma is right - if she were still using, it would be very obvious to everyone. There's no way she'd be teaching. Look up pics of meth addicts, especially ones that show you before and after. Even a few months can make a major difference in how they look.

    My advice is this: If you really cannot get past the image you have of her from the past, request a new teacher. When they ask why, simply say "We knew each other at another time, things ended badly, and I want to ensure that no one on either side feels that they're being unfairly treated, or that my child suffers because she and I can't communicate well."

    If you think you can get past it, give her a chance. If it seems like it's not working, then request a new teacher.

    Either way, ,do not tell anyone about her past. She has very likely overcome it, and you don't want to be the person responsible for destroying her life after she got it back together.
    wendythewriter

    Answer by wendythewriter at 12:09 PM on Aug. 17, 2012

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.