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What do I do, who can I go too?

I think of death often, a bit too often. I would have to say lately I think of suicide but it's not a serious thought. I've tried to talk to my husband but he doesn't care to listen. He blows me off like it's "just a phase", "you just want attention". And in a way I do just want attention, from him. All he does is tell me how wrong I am, or how lazy I am or how much weight I've gained since having our child.
I don't know what to do, or who to go to. I don't want the world to know about what I think on a daily bases. I don't want to let my family down, and I don't want to be pegged with another failure of mine. I don't want someone to feel they need to watch what they say to me because of my "condition" and I don't want people to feel sorry for me. I don't want the thoughts of "look how naive she is, she didn't finish college and all she does is dream". When I look at my son all these feelings go away, truely. He is perfect.

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Asked by Anonymous at 10:39 AM on Feb. 5, 2009 in Health

Answers (8)
  • I would think you should visit your reg dr. Tell him about how you are feeling. How old is your baby. You could have postpartum depresion.....Very serious, some ppl do go through with there thoughts on this and you should get some help immediatily!! I know it makes you feel bad b/c you KNOW you need help, but it is so much better to get help than to go around feeling bad all of the time. Even if it isn't postpartum, it could be a serious imbalance in your body making you feel bad. Don't feel bad you need help, the only reason to feel bad is to not get help when you know you need it!! So please visit your local dr. If you can't afford it go to the health dept and le tthem know you are not feeling well they should be able to help you out..... Good luck, hope you get the help you need!

    Answer by lovinmomto3 at 10:46 AM on Feb. 5, 2009

  • You need someone to talk to, someone who's in your corner. Don't even for a second worry about what other people think, we always assume people think the worst of us. I'm sure if you talk to your ob she can recommend counseling or groups with other women in the same situation. Maybe after you talk it out you can come up with a good strategy to make your DH understand you.

    Answer by Farrahann at 10:49 AM on Feb. 5, 2009

  • your not the only one , i constantly think about death and dying every time i leave the house let alone just walk around it . trust me your not the only one but you could always talk to ppl who know who go through . like me !. lol but with the whole suicide thing ive thought of it a couple times but never pursued it , just because im scared of leaving this world and my son by himself , consider a therapist , i have but i dont have the money . but if thats not an option then keep yourself happy and active . do things that you and your son enjoy !

    Answer by colbysmommie95 at 10:51 AM on Feb. 5, 2009

  • I just lost a family member to suicide 11 days ago. I urge you to call for help now, your minister, your doctor, another family member. Your son wanting you to live is reason enough to live. Live for him so he can put his arms around his mommy and not touch a picture of his mommy. Live for you so you can walk with him instead of leaving him and the only walks he would have with you are made up in his mind. Men are sobs on their best days and and b#*$*(@& on their worst days. You physically gave birth to or adopted a child - both ways require extreme physical and emotional strength from a woman. That is how strong you are. Hospitals have groups for people with emotional difficulties and so do social service agencies. Call some one. Write again.

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:18 AM on Feb. 5, 2009

  • hmm.i suffer from depression have to get on meds to change your way of thinking.i tried to kill my self and ended up in the hospital.go to the em ward.tell them you are suicidal.they will need someone who will listen and husband said the same thing till i tried it thenm he didnt think it was so funny.i know people are so judgemental.dont listen to them.everyone is out for them be strong if you want to talk you can pm any time i will talk and listen...get some help though.or go to the hospital...please...

    Answer by snowmom974 at 11:21 AM on Feb. 5, 2009

  • If you are currnelty having suicidal ideation I would seek out a local suicide hotline. Also make an appopintment with your medical doctor or call the United Way Fisrt Call for help - they can point you in the right direction.

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:38 AM on Feb. 5, 2009

  • I'm sorry to hear about your recent loss. It has to be tragic for you.


    Answer by Anonymous at 11:59 AM on Feb. 5, 2009

  • I am in a similar boat (what with dark thoughts and hopeless feelings). You are NOT alone, and it is very important to talk to your doctor. I am going to see my OB on Monday. I do not know if what I am feeling is Post-Partum Depression, or something else, but I know that I trust my doctor and she will be a good place to start to find an answer.

    I am so sorry that your husband is not taking what you are saying seriously. For your sake, and your family's sake it is important to talk to someone outside of your family/friend circle, who can evaluate and treat you (either with counseling or possibly medication) without you fearing repurcussions and backlash. Good luck, mama, hang in there!

    Answer by littlejreece at 1:43 AM on Feb. 6, 2009

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