Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Did you have family come stay after the baby was born? Should I?

When you came home from the hospital did you have family members come for a few days to help you with the baby, house. etc.? What family member?
My MIL wants to come over and stay but honestly I dont think I will be able to stand it. I dont want to feel like im doing everything wrong. I just feel like she will discourage me. How did you feel when you first came home?

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 4:25 PM on Feb. 5, 2009 in Pregnancy

Answers (57)
  • I haven't had to do this yet. 3 1/2 more months! Woohoo! But I am planning on having my mom stay for a few nights.
    musikdoll

    Answer by musikdoll at 4:26 PM on Feb. 5, 2009

  • i didn't .. i really enjoyed my time at home with my dh and son.. and with our second son too... family members brought us meals.. which was very helpful...

    VictinaG

    Answer by VictinaG at 4:27 PM on Feb. 5, 2009

  • My mom came, and she was helpful without being intrusive. I wouldn't have anyone come to stay that would make you feel uncomfortable.
    TweenAndTwinMom

    Answer by TweenAndTwinMom at 4:27 PM on Feb. 5, 2009

  • well i haven't had mine yet but i would rather my mom come stay rather than my mother in law i'm only 16 mind you but i live with my mom but i would say a mom or a sister who has had a baby or something i'm voting for the mom thing someone that won't tell you that you are doing something wrong just rather show you how they would do it idk though like i said haven't had the baby yet and live with my mom by the time i have my baby i will be moved out though but i have my sister and the boyfriend... so ya
    scared_mommy16

    Answer by scared_mommy16 at 4:28 PM on Feb. 5, 2009

  • I did not have anyone stay with me, but each day someone would come over to "help out". In reality they just wanted to take the baby, when the help I actually needed was maybe a little housework so I could give my full attention to the baby. If you are not comfortable just politely say that you would like some time alone with your baby for a while. She will be insulted most likely, but this is your time to spend with your baby.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:31 PM on Feb. 5, 2009

  • I didn't have anyone stay with us. It was just me, DH and our son. My mom would come by sometimes during the day, but she would call first. My MIL lives an hour away, and she's not the type to pop by uninvited.

    I was a little nervous about it being just DH and I when we brought our son home, but it was really nice! I didn't have to entertain anyone, I could just breastfeed wherever I was, I could look like crap because that's how I looked :)
    ap9902

    Answer by ap9902 at 4:31 PM on Feb. 5, 2009

  • So do you think it would be rude to say no thanks for the help but im fine. She says I will need her help I wont know what to do and that I need parenting classes etc. My Dh and I will be fine right?? Im feeling like she's just wanting to take control and be with the baby. I told my Dh the main things we will need help with are food cleaning etc. he's a mamas boy lol this is my first so Im just trying to make sure im not over reacting the situation lol. Thanks:)
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:33 PM on Feb. 5, 2009

  • I personnally did not have anyone stay with me. I work full time and wanted to spend as much time as possible with my baby before I returned to work. My MIL offered several times to come but I knew she would drive me crazy. If you have any hesitation I would not plan on anyone staying. If you become overwhelmed you can always have someone come then.
    maddiemygirl

    Answer by maddiemygirl at 4:35 PM on Feb. 5, 2009

  • Well I just came home with #4 all by myself with no help and I never had any help like that with the other 3 either!! I guess I feel like you gotta do it alone at some point you might as well get used to it!!
    scaredmommy08

    Answer by scaredmommy08 at 4:36 PM on Feb. 5, 2009

  • i think if ur gonna be uncomfortable then u shouldnt have her there- i had my little sis over to help me last time and she drove me up a wall and it made the first few days hell- she did help with keeping my older boys enertained when i was busy with the baby but it wasnt worth the headaches! lol- and if ur mil is anything like mines tellin me i need to put a hat on the babies head even though its 90 degrees outside then u should def invite her visit but not to stay lol!
    lovelyli217

    Answer by lovelyli217 at 4:40 PM on Feb. 5, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.