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Will she ever get used to him ?

Well my daughter's X is doing the visitation thing with her and my grandbaby. Grandbaby is 11 months. He has been doing this type of unsupervised visits for about 3-4 months. When he comes to get her for his 4 hour visits twice a week my grandbaby just starts whale crying... :(...... I have tested her with other men/friends/acquances and she does not do that? Does anyone know if or when she will get used to him or will she ever? Do you think she feels my daughters anger/hate/distust towards him (the X) when he comes and gets my grandbaby for his visits? It breaks my heart to see her cry like this.. It is not just a whimper it is a ball eyed cry with tears...

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JamiesMom08

Asked by JamiesMom08 at 4:45 PM on Feb. 5, 2009 in Relationships

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Answers (12)
  • I am sure your grandaughter feels your daughters anger/hate/distust towards him. Babies pick up easy. If you could talk to your daughter about hiding these feelings if possible, it will be a lot better life for your grandaughter.
    Kat122

    Answer by Kat122 at 4:51 PM on Feb. 5, 2009

  • I keep telling her.. Just act like you are his friend let him come in the house for a little while sit down etc..... I have watched her do that a few times and still grandbaby cries......
    JamiesMom08

    Answer by JamiesMom08 at 4:54 PM on Feb. 5, 2009

  • She is only 11 months. Of course she will! When a child that young only sees someone twice a week things take longer. I think he needs more frequent visitation. I am sure that she doesn't cry for the full 4 hours he has her.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:57 PM on Feb. 5, 2009

  • Maybe the father is treating her bad..Maybe not giving her enough attention and letting her cry when she is at his house. Is anyone there to help him?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:19 PM on Feb. 5, 2009

  • Answered at 4:19 PM on Feb. 5, 2009 by: Anonymous
    Maybe the father is treating her bad..Maybe not giving her enough attention and letting her cry when she is at his house. Is anyone there to help him? Select as Best Answer Report this answer ----
    WHY ANSWER ANONYMOUSLY????????? WHEN YOU SAY SOMETHING LIKE THAT I AM WORRIED AS IT IS... PLEASE YOU DONT KNOW WHAT RUNS THROUGH MY HEAD WHEN I SEE HER CRY LIKE THAT.... SO HELP ME......... WE DONT KNOW WHAT HAPPENS AT HIS HOUSE.... SOMETIMES HIS GIRLFRIEND IS THERE.... THAT DOES NOT SAY MUCH.....

    I AM SURE SHE DOES NOT CRY THE WHOLE 4 HOURS BUT MORE VISITATION IS NOT POSSIBLE....
    JamiesMom08

    Answer by JamiesMom08 at 5:29 PM on Feb. 5, 2009

  • It is very concerning to me to hear that she starts balling when she see's him. There is something not right. My daughter doesnt get upset until i'm completely gone or if she has never seen them before. Twice a week she should be comfortable....Somethings wrong here. Someone is doing something wrong...
    Sandiii

    Answer by Sandiii at 5:45 PM on Feb. 5, 2009

  • Idea--- get one of those webcam things where you can watch from home hidden in a teddy bear or something or side of a diaper bag lol and have him take it with her! Then you could SEE what is going on. OR suggest he watch her at your place one day while you go out and leave a camera on! It may give you some insight as to what her issue is, or if really its how YOU guys react towards him!
    Sandiii

    Answer by Sandiii at 5:46 PM on Feb. 5, 2009

  • YEs we have to do something.. Because like our attorney said she should be used to him by now... There is a SPY shop down the road from where I work I might just go there and see what they have... I could worry myself to death if I dont do something... Thanks to All.. I will update...
    JamiesMom08

    Answer by JamiesMom08 at 5:58 PM on Feb. 5, 2009

  • please do! feel free to message me to let me know what happens!
    Sandiii

    Answer by Sandiii at 6:11 PM on Feb. 5, 2009

  • Check with your attorney before you go hiding a camera in anything. In some states, that can get you in a lot of trouble. I would also check with your attorney to find out if CPS can do unscheduled drop by visits to check out the house and living situation (while the baby is there). Best of luck to your family.
    cypris420

    Answer by cypris420 at 6:38 PM on Feb. 5, 2009

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