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4 Bumps

Is an adopted child legally obligated to help his bio family out with medical stuff

like if someone needs a bone marrow transplant or something

he is 31 now and we contacted him for the first time and explained our situation, he told us to stuff it...

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 4:24 PM on Aug. 26, 2012 in Adoption

Answers (44)
  • No
    escuchar

    Answer by escuchar at 12:55 PM on Apr. 14, 2014

  • I feel so badly for him. He didn't know he as adopted and then bam you tell him and not only tell him but expect him to help you. I would leave him alone your not his family and I doubt he will ever want you in his life after you wait all this time to contact him. I am guessing this is a troll or maybe hoping it is.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:57 AM on May. 23, 2013

  • No. No one can be forced to donate body parts.
    booklover545

    Answer by booklover545 at 11:53 PM on Oct. 6, 2012

  • that's his right and you gave him up so he is really bitter toward you. if you contacted him just to explain and get to know him and this happened yrs later he may have had a different attitude. you made that bed now lie in it
    Keni-Lyn

    Answer by Keni-Lyn at 1:30 AM on Sep. 4, 2012

  • Such a sad situation all around. He truly owes you nothing, but the hope of the slightest possiblility of saving your 5 y/o must be driving your emotions so much that you cannot realize what havoc has just been created in the life of your 31 y/o. IF he truly didn't know he was adopted (and what a crime if that were true), then you just informed him that his whole life has been a "lie". If he can't trust his own parents, who can he trust? A "stranger" on the phone?

    I can't say that I wouldn't have done the same thing. Your mother's heart is torn between two sons. One stolen so long ago & one whose life has just begun. Thinking it through, I would have called him. If his adoptive parents (who are also REAL) didn't tell him that he was adopted, then I don't think I would have trusted them to pass along a message so vital to your 5 y/o. They could have dissuaded him from call you back. Praying for your family. Good luck!
    doodlebopfan

    Answer by doodlebopfan at 12:01 PM on Sep. 1, 2012

  • As heartbreaking as it is,, he has no legal obligations for anything,, I might write a long letter to him,, I assume that no-one else is a match? The odds are not in your favor if it is for one of your current children, and no other child or you and your husband are not a match,, I would think out of kindness he would want to get tested. I am on the bone marrow donor list for a stranger. good luck and sorry.
    kimigogo

    Answer by kimigogo at 8:48 AM on Aug. 30, 2012

  • No. And if this why you found him I'm not surprised he told you to stuff it. It was wrong of his aparents not to tell him he was adopted so that wasn't your fault, but damn talk about insensitive. How dare you refer to yourself as his real family. Jeesh, you think his adoptive family are unreal?
    onethentwins

    Answer by onethentwins at 8:58 PM on Aug. 28, 2012

  • Even if he hadn't been adopted out, it is his body, and his choice whether to give pieces of it away. There is nothing you can do in a legal sense if that is what you're asking, and I can completely understand his position.
    Mom-2-3-Girlz

    Answer by Mom-2-3-Girlz at 8:54 AM on Aug. 28, 2012

  • Hmm. At first glance I'm having doubts that this story is true.
    No one has a right to harvest tissue, or organs from another. Period.
    But there seems to be a lot of triggering language in the post. I think it's meant to inflame..and get people to rally that keeping records sealed is a good thing because bmoms will come out of the woods to get something from the adoptee- and to boot inform him he's adopted as its not her place to tell.
    I call BS
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:13 AM on Aug. 28, 2012

  • He is definitely not obligated to his biologically family in any way, shape, or form...be it medically, financially, having a relationship, etc. Actually, in this case, it doesn't matter that he was adopted...he is an adult and has the right to choose to help or not.

    Here's a tip for you......don't tell him that you are his REAL family. To him, you aren't his REAL family, the family that raised him is his REAL family. That kind of language alone might be sure to get you off on the wrong foot.
    AllAboutKeeley

    Answer by AllAboutKeeley at 6:02 PM on Aug. 27, 2012

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