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My baby has a fatal condition called anencephaly, where the skull did not fully close. I am 17 weeks pregnant. Should I go full term, or deliver the baby in a few weeks? I am torn apart.

The doctor said that there is no chance of the baby living for more than a few hours after birth. It hurts so bad. I don't want my baby to die. The videos and pictures I have seen are horrible. I am so scared.

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MayrasMomma

Asked by MayrasMomma at 11:14 PM on Feb. 5, 2009 in Pregnancy

Level 3 (27 Credits)
Answers (15)
  • I'm so sorry that you are going through this. I can't imagine what you are going through. I hope that all turns out well for you and I will keep you in my prayers. God bless you.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:16 PM on Feb. 5, 2009

  • oh my, i dont know if you are a praying woman, but now is the time to do so.
    I dont know what I would do, Id like to think Id go full term.
    But only you can decide.
    It might be easier to do it now.
    Or it might be more fulfiiling to go full term to have as much time as possible with your baby.
    Auntiemom410

    Answer by Auntiemom410 at 11:17 PM on Feb. 5, 2009

  • I'm so sorry :-( Honestly I don't think anyone can answer that for you. It's a personal choice only you can make. IMO I think it might hurt more if you went to term, but then I don't know if I could abort my baby either. I'm sorry you have to go through this. You are in my prayers.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:17 PM on Feb. 5, 2009

  • I am so sorry for your pain. Anecephaly is an aweful, heartbreaking condition. I would personally speak with the doctor about delivering as soon as possible to ease the burden on you and your family. Carrying to term is not going to help the baby or increase its chances. Your doctor knows what is best in this situation and anecephaly is not a diagnosis that they come to lightly.
    Danielle720

    Answer by Danielle720 at 11:18 PM on Feb. 5, 2009

  • I am so sorry.

    This is a personal decision. You could carry baby and get a chance to see him/her which might be even more painful with the months of bonding during pregnancy. Delivering sooner will be less of a production so to speak, still awful but more like a later term miscarriage. I don't know, if it were me and it's NOT, I'd do it sooner. Sometimes souls back out of their contract but decide to re-enter with another pregnancy, same mom. If you believe that stuff, which I do. Good luck, please find some support somewhere, you will get through this.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:20 PM on Feb. 5, 2009

  • I am so sorry. I would try to go full-term. The only reason I say this is because when you see the baby you may not be as horrified as when they are super early. THis way you can get pictures done for memory.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:22 PM on Feb. 5, 2009

  • I would go full term so i would have more time to deal with my feelings and know there is nothing
    more that I could have done for the good of my child.I do not want you to ever blame yourself!Either way do what's best for you to be able to deal with this.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:37 PM on Feb. 5, 2009

  • I am trying to find the page of parents who went full term. It was so beautifully written. They spent over a day with their wonderful daughter and just enjoyed her, even knowing she wasn't going to make it. It's not the same for everyone, and it's a choice you have to make on your own.

    I would go full term, if there was a chance that I could hold my child and tell him/her how much I loved them I would take it. :)
    celticreverie

    Answer by celticreverie at 12:09 AM on Feb. 6, 2009

  • I should also add that whatever decision you make is your decision and no one can judge you, or look down on you for EITHER choice! You need to do what you feel is best for you, and your family, etc. Talk to the doctor about your choices and seek council if you need it. ! Lots of hugs to you right now, seriously.
    celticreverie

    Answer by celticreverie at 12:17 AM on Feb. 6, 2009

  • I'm so sorry that you have to go through this, I can't imagine how hard it would be.

    I agree with celticreverie. I would go full term, if there was a chance that I could hold my child and tell him/her how much I loved them I would take it.
    My prayers are with you.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:25 AM on Feb. 6, 2009

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