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How do I treat my awful sister-in-law?!?

Ok, I have a GREAT family on my husbands side, I love all my brother-in-laws and I get along SO well with one of my sisters-in-laws and a soon to be sis-in-law, but I have one who was just got married to one of the young twins a few months back and is pregnant. This girl is dreadful, shes alomst unbearable to be around, she refuses to speak to anyone unless spoken to, she has my bro-in-law wrapped around her finger, she has not once said thank you for anything, whether it be for a gift or just for having her for dinner, she once told me when I got sick of her attitude and confronted her, that she is anti-social and if we don't talk to her than she won't speak...I have my sweet bro-in-law suckered by her into turning against us and defending her...I know its his wife but it comes to a point when you have to stick up for your family when you know that your wife is wrong. Should I blow up and just tell her off or just ignore her?


Asked by G-MansMama at 1:16 AM on Feb. 6, 2009 in Relationships

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Answers (25)
  • ignore her, she wants to cause problems. she may want to pull your brother-inlaw from the family so she can have him for her self. Don't let her win.

    Answer by gammie at 10:04 AM on Feb. 6, 2009

  • no its not your place when you get married you have a new family and that person becomes your other half. your suppose to stand by your spouse first. if ppl were suppose to side with their family all the time they would be living with their parents all their life.
    she doesnt sound bad she probably is just anti social!
    except that or you guys will regret it.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:31 AM on Feb. 6, 2009

  • So she is anti social and that makes her a bad person?

    Answer by momavanessa at 1:34 AM on Feb. 6, 2009

  • it desnt sound like SHE is the awful one..........

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:41 AM on Feb. 6, 2009

  • Well sorry to say but you sound like my ex hubby family they said the same exact things about me that you are saying about her, and none of it is really true I was hard for me to just be myself around people I didn't know very well, so I wouldn't talk, and its not that I didn't say thank you on purpose its just everyone was so busy that I didn't want to interrupt anyone and have them get annoyed, I say you give the poor chic a break and maybe try to be nicer to her and get her to open up a little, and remember he is her husband so he knows her better than you guys do and probably has good reason for sticking up for her


    Answer by hautemama83 at 1:53 AM on Feb. 6, 2009

  • i agree with haute 100%

    Answer by momavanessa at 2:04 AM on Feb. 6, 2009

  • honestly, your in law sounds just like me when im with my husband! his family is hispanic, and they speak spanish, which i UNDERSTAND, but i dont speak it. but his mom has always been sort of snobby, and whnever i HAVE confronter her, she dienies it, but im also painfully shy and afraid of maing a dumb*ss of myself because i might not understand what they said or i didnt hear it all he was *bad hearing*
    so maybe shes just shy or has some other issue. but let her know how much it bothers you how much she's antisocial and that you dont want her to be alienated form the family just because of that. or play a game of charades........but have people come up witht he things you have to act out.l....I loosened up with my inlaws SOOOOOOOOOOO much after that!

    Answer by shortycmlb at 7:51 AM on Feb. 6, 2009

  • another thing you could try is asking her about HER family, and here SHE came from and exchange stories.......

    Answer by shortycmlb at 7:53 AM on Feb. 6, 2009

  • I agree. Try reaching out to her. I personally have been cripplingly shy around my inlaws. I am just starting to come out of my shell around them, but it's really hard. There are five brothers and four of them are married. When I am around all of the wives I feel like a totally unsophisticated, uneducated, ugly little twerp. I know I'm actually moderately attractive and and fairly bright, but I haven't finished college yet and they all have at least one masters. More in some cases. They get together and talk and I feel like the uncool girl trying to sit at the popular table. It's not even that their conversation is something that I can't contribute to, I am smart enough to go toe to toe with them, I'm just sooo shy and self conscious. Try reaching out to her. Spend some time just the two of you. Maybe get your kids together or go for coffee. I bet she's not as bad as you think.

    Answer by beckcorc at 8:19 AM on Feb. 6, 2009

  • I have a horrid SIL- I don't deal w/ her except to commiserate w/ my mother about her behavior. I have almost completely lost my once close relationship w/ my bro cuz of his wife. He knows how I feel and why. I have yet to meet my niece- she is over a year old now. I am afraid of what might come out of my mouth the next time I see her, and I don't want to sever the relationship w/ my bro, so I am waiting her out. Unfortunately, I am waiting for my brother to *see the light* and extricate himself from her clutches... I know where I stand in relation to *our problem*, just make sure YOU are not helping create the situation w/ your SIL... good luck, and remember how hormonal you (general you) can be when pregnant- maybe some reason for her *behavior*??

    Answer by mtnmama111 at 8:23 AM on Feb. 6, 2009