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3 Bumps

Is it appropriate to cuddle with your 40 year old son for a long time?

My son, who is 40, comes home from California every 5 months. When he does, he insists I sit on the same chair with him so that he can cuddle, put his head on my shoulder and hold my hand. He insists I do this. I am very uncomfortable but am afraid to refuse as to not hurt his feelings. I feel this is very inappropriate for his age. When he has a girlfriend he doesn't seem to do this. However, when he is not dating anyone, he continually wants my affection.

Answer Question
 
Rudy12

Asked by Rudy12 at 8:51 PM on Sep. 10, 2012 in Adult Children (18+)

Level 2 (11 Credits)
Answers (29)
  • I am speechless.
    DJDNY

    Answer by DJDNY at 8:53 PM on Sep. 10, 2012

  • well I had a clinets son who did that. and I also thought it was strange.. but what got me was the daughter use to massage her.. including her boobs in front of workers.. (yes it was reported but they found nothing wrong with it from what the daughter said.. ))
    but yes stop cuddling him.. my other thought he may be gay
    ajrjj05

    Answer by ajrjj05 at 8:54 PM on Sep. 10, 2012

  • When my mother was living my brothers would come home hugging her tight, than ask her to fix their favorite foods and talk, laugh have good times than the big hug when its time to go but nothing like what you are mentioning or have I heard others say they want to do this with their mother.
    virginiamama71

    Answer by virginiamama71 at 8:57 PM on Sep. 10, 2012

  • Wait. What? For what reason? Is he sick like terminal? I find it a little weird. Ohn balls! I find it really freaking strange. Not appropriate unless he's terminal or needs comforting.
    QuinnMae

    Answer by QuinnMae at 8:57 PM on Sep. 10, 2012

  • I think it's on the inappropriate side. My brother who is almost 40 has never done anything close to that with are mom. Or any of my older cousins with their moms.
    JennieMarie1103

    Answer by JennieMarie1103 at 8:58 PM on Sep. 10, 2012

  • My guess is that he does not have much human contact (touch and/or support) if he does not have a girlfriend. It might be good for him to talk to someone. You might suggest that there is more room on the couch and you can sit right next to each other. That is only if you are comfortable. It does not matter what other people think if you are not comfortable you should not have to comply.

    I think you should definitely talk to him as an adult mabe at the kitchen table and just explain how you feel.

    My son has gone through some tough times this last yearand he has done better when I have hugged and maybe a little longer th usual. He is a litlle to big, as am I, to squeeze into one chair comfortably.
    Dardenella

    Answer by Dardenella at 8:58 PM on Sep. 10, 2012

  • lol
    staciandababy

    Answer by staciandababy at 9:00 PM on Sep. 10, 2012

  • No, just NO
    KristiS11384

    Answer by KristiS11384 at 9:07 PM on Sep. 10, 2012

  • Aww I think it's sweet. It's still your son! Most of us long for the days when they were still sweet & cuddly & were sad when they pulled away from us. I would never turn down the love & attention of my child(ren) You are blessed.

    mrsmom110

    Answer by mrsmom110 at 9:10 PM on Sep. 10, 2012

  •    Reminds me of this book!!!!

    m-avi

    Answer by m-avi at 9:12 PM on Sep. 10, 2012

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