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Im ready to have my second child but my husband does'nt want now!!

We have been married for 3 years our marriage is great, we have a beautiful 21 month old boy, im a stay at home mom and my husband just got promoted to a manager position, i feel ready to have a second kid,also my son sometimes gets bored and i can see how much happier he will be if he had a sister or brother to play with.

I had my iud removed 2 weeks ago and i didnt told my husband he found out and he was a little upset.,we had sex one of the days i was ovulating and if im pregnant i dont know how he will take news, what should i do?

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Asked by LinaG02 at 3:02 PM on Sep. 27, 2012 in Trying to Conceive

Level 6 (112 Credits)
Answers (11)
  • Wow well that is very serious. I suggest talking to your husband.

    Answer by txnmomof4 at 3:08 PM on Sep. 27, 2012

  • I'd be having a talk with dh. It's not something you should have done without talking to him in the first place. In a marriage to bring a child into the world is the decission of both parents not just one. Perhaps there is something else going on at work that is bothering him but you really need to sit down and talk.

    Answer by baconbits at 3:08 PM on Sep. 27, 2012

  • It may b too late to say this but it always a bad idea to trick your husband into something especially something as long lasting ad life changing as a child.
    This was not just your decision.

    Answer by Dardenella at 3:09 PM on Sep. 27, 2012

  • 1- You should have discussed this with your husband before you had the Mirena taken out. 2- how do you know you were ovulating? Most women's cycles are wonky for a while after birth control, especially Mirena

    Answer by KA91 at 3:13 PM on Sep. 27, 2012

  • I already talked to him and he sure wants another kid but he says that he will love that to happen in 2 years and i understand his choice since he wants us to spend time together and have fun before we have a second kid but i been having this though in my head of having a second child and i dont know how to let it go?

    Comment by LinaG02 (original poster) at 3:13 PM on Sep. 27, 2012

  • First of you should have told your dh you removed your iud.. i see why he is upset.. it's as if you are lying to him.. well you are.. I'd be pissed that is a very big deal.

    Answer by mommys2cupcakes at 3:27 PM on Sep. 27, 2012

  • You let it go by understanding that not doing so could damage your marriage. And the price might be another child your two year old will resent, as well! Toddlers are self-centered critters. My observation, the closer in age, the higher the risk the kids despise each other. The charm of being a big sibling is more theoretical than real.

    Answer by gdiamante at 5:33 PM on Sep. 27, 2012

  • You screwed up. You don't just stop using birth control without your partner agreeing that it's time to have another kid. It's deceitful. You're in a partnership, and that partnership may mean you need to wait a while longer before having another child. If you disagree, you argue your case; you don't just try to get pregnant on the sly.

    Answer by SWasson at 6:09 PM on Sep. 27, 2012

  • My gosh, you shouldn't have had your IUD removed without talking to your husband. You may have lost his trust, and a pregnancy made that way is a bad idea. He might very well resent it a whole lot. If you're lucky, you didn't get pregnant yet, and you and your husband will have a chance to sort out your details so you can either try again or get on some less permanent birth control like condoms or the pill till you're ready. If you're not lucky, you got pregnant, and be careful what you wish for because you probably set yourself up for some rocky times. Good luck.

    Answer by Ballad at 7:14 PM on Sep. 27, 2012

  • wow, need to discuss with dh asap

    Answer by rockabell.2009 at 9:20 AM on Oct. 2, 2012

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