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Is this right?

My husband and I attend a Catholic church that he has attended since childhood. I really want religion for our kids, but I also want the spiritual satisfaction for myself from church that I simply do not get from this church. I am not sure why, I just dont. He does get it and enjoys this church. He said I should go on a church hunt for a church that gives me spiritual satisfaction and we will go to that one instead. I do not think this is in any way fair to him. He is attached to this church and I do not feel it is my place to take him away from it since I am not attched to any particular church. Should I just continue to go to our current church? I dont want to separate. I like going as a family. What would you all suggest?


Asked by LovinEveryDay at 7:41 PM on Feb. 8, 2009 in Religion & Beliefs

Level 1 (3 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (16)
  • I went to a Methodist church for a long time and I really wasn't getting anything out of it. The message was nice and the people were, too, but I just didn't feel it! I went on a "church hunt" and after several tries, I have found a non-denominational church where hubby and I both feel like we are part of the family and our daughter and have God in her life. It is a very community-oriented church and they have great programs for kids. Church has changed so much from what it used to be and I think you should find something that is a good fit for your whole family especially if your hubby is open to a change. You can't just go on Sunday mornings and "fake it" or your kids will know and it won't mean as much to them!

    Answer by Indygirl18 at 7:49 PM on Feb. 8, 2009

  • Maybe you can find a church that offers spiritual satisfaction for you both. A Church hunt certainly wouldn't hurt anything.

    Answer by anetrnlov at 7:44 PM on Feb. 8, 2009

  • You could still go to that church. And find one you like and go to that one at a different time. Like go to yours on Wednesdays and then his on Sundays.

    Answer by sarapurser at 7:45 PM on Feb. 8, 2009

  • I think a church hunt is a good idea. You both explore different ones and try to find one you both like.

    Answer by ldsdragonmom at 7:50 PM on Feb. 8, 2009

  • I think that was very sweet of him to suggest a church hunt and then decide to go to what ever church you choose. Sounds like you two are very happy.

    Answer by pnwmom at 7:54 PM on Feb. 8, 2009

  • if he's willing to 'hunt' with you, what more could you ask for? as a family, you both need to be 'fed' from your attending church..

    Answer by thehairnazi at 7:54 PM on Feb. 8, 2009

  • are there other catholic churches in your area that you could attend? have you contact your local diocese to see what they have to offer in regards to bible studies, etc? i would also suggest listening to a cd by Father Larry Richards (you can get them at for free just pay for shipping which something like $1), it is called "THE MASS EXPLAINED" and may help some. have you checked out the group here on cafemom Catholic Moms, they can be of great help too! also, i am not trying to be rude in the least bit, but the mass is not always about what you get from it.. it is also about what you give... that is where the group here on Cafemom can help out. but i truly wish you the best. check you diocese for other churches in your area. prayers for you and your decision.

    Answer by ArmyWifeMomof3 at 7:59 PM on Feb. 8, 2009

  • Your spiritual fulfillment is just as important to as his.

    I understand that this is church he's been attending since childhood, but that doesn't mean that he needs to stick around. A lot of people continue attending churches they've attended childhood because its familiar, when they're really not getting what they need spiritual. God means for you move forward, not tread in one place, and sometimes that means uprooting from one church and going to another.

    DB and I definitely did this. We both loved the church we were attending when we first met, but felt that our spiritual needs weren't being met. Hence, we began to hunt for a different church.

    ...and we're still hunting. LOL

    Maybe try to get involved in some church activities and see if that doesn't help.

    Answer by .Peaches. at 8:09 PM on Feb. 8, 2009

  • I think it was very kind of your husband to suggest that. No I don't think it would be unfair to do a little searching, I'm sure your hubby would attend a few with you as well. He may be curious to see himself. I would look around, attend a few, if you don't find any, you always have his... but if you find one, talk it over with your hubby, and maybe alternate every other weekend.

    Answer by xxhazeldovexx at 8:36 PM on Feb. 8, 2009

  • I don't think any church will give anyone the spiritual satisfaction they need, Only God can do that, seeking Him and asking Him might be the better way to find a church He wants you to be placed in and grow in. If your seeking religion.. lots of churches will give you that but if you seek a relationship with Jesus Christ. Only Jesus can help you with that! Bless you on your journey!

    Answer by Shaneagle777 at 8:45 PM on Feb. 8, 2009