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(RANT!!!) If you kept bitching and whining for something, and it was finally in your grasp, would you ignore the phone calls?? adult content

My ex wants to sign over his rights to my child and have my DH adopt her. DH and I are MORE than eager to get this done! Its going to cost more than we can afford right now, so we have to wait until Christmas is over, and work picks up here (around next summer). Of course the ex and his wife think I'm just doing whatever I can to put it off so I can keep getting his money. I want it done SO MUCH MORE than I can explain since she's supposed to go there for Christmas and has been BEGGING me not to make her go.
The last time she went there was supposed to be for 6 weeks, but she came home after 2 because they couldnt handle her. In the 2 weeks they terriorized her, brainwashed (or tried to) her, tried to make her afraid of my DH (cause he's SUCH a bad man that the ex is willing to have him adopt, right), and they acutally had the nerve to GUILT HER for the child support that she knows nothing about (as is should be) and how since he has to pay for her, he cant afford to feed his other two kids.

Anyways, I told them in Aug I wouldnt be able to pay for this until next summer. But they decide to text me a couple days ago wanting to know why I havent sent them any paperwork. We got into a big arguement about how I'm stealing the food out of his kids mouths while DH and I sit on our golden thrones eating our steak and lobsters. (Our thrones are really silver, I mean, come on!)

So the next day I spent ALL DAY calling more attorneys and trying to find someone who will do this cheaper, or take payments, or something. I finally found on who can work with me, but she can't give me an exact quote until she gets a written statement from *edit* HIM. I text his wife (he doesnt have a working phone), and tell her what I need from him if they want to get this done. She tells me he'd be home at 2:30 and she'd give him the message. So, now, 2 days later, I havent heard one responce. Obviously its not THAT fucking important then, right??

 
toughluck08

Asked by toughluck08 at 1:29 PM on Oct. 4, 2012 in Relationships

Level 18 (5,944 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (12)
  • So he wants you to spend the money to get her to him, doesn't give a shit about her anyway, but yet wants you to go through with the adoption...does he not realize that the money you'd spend on sending her there would get him out of her life that much sooner? (And, also, if both parties agree, I'm sure you can get out of the court ordered visitation.)
    hopeandglory53

    Answer by hopeandglory53 at 6:19 PM on Oct. 4, 2012

  • I'd text again and tell her that the attorney is waiting for a response. Does he not pay enough monthly to cover the attorney's fees? Is that the problem?
    3libras

    Answer by 3libras at 1:34 PM on Oct. 4, 2012

  • Why not ask the EX to pay 6 months all at once so you can get the adoption done right away?
    He will be paying it anyway ande is "getting out of" paying for her until she is 18 so tell him it is either that or this could drag on even longer depending on how work improves. lol
    Dardenella

    Answer by Dardenella at 1:35 PM on Oct. 4, 2012

  • I hope it works out soon. Who knows? Maybe something else is going on in their lives right now and they can't get right back to you?
    NearSeattleMom

    Answer by NearSeattleMom at 1:39 PM on Oct. 4, 2012

  • Text the wife back, make sure he got the message. She could have forgot to give it to him.
    keisha613

    Answer by keisha613 at 2:31 PM on Oct. 4, 2012

  • tell him if he wants it done sooner he needs to pay half or shut the fuck up till you can afford it
    LostSoul88

    Answer by LostSoul88 at 2:44 PM on Oct. 4, 2012

  • cant you use tax returner just to get it done sooner when that comes around?
    LostSoul88

    Answer by LostSoul88 at 2:46 PM on Oct. 4, 2012

  • If he doesn't want her anymore, then why the hell is she even going for visitation? (Assuming he doesn't even want her there...that is.) Why make the two of them do what they don't want to do?
    hopeandglory53

    Answer by hopeandglory53 at 3:49 PM on Oct. 4, 2012

  • Sorry, just beating my head against the desk trying to understand this man's "logic."
    hopeandglory53

    Answer by hopeandglory53 at 6:20 PM on Oct. 4, 2012

  • I asked him if he could do ANYTHING toward the costs. He said no. He can't afford anything more than what I already get in child support. Basically, he wont pay a dime more than he has to, but will bitch at me since I cant pull $2000 out of my ass!

    3libras...he is ordered $226 a month...so I'd have to wait almost 10 months before I could use CS toward an attorney.

    meooma...No. If one is going to sign over rights, in this state AND the other state, there has to be another willing to adopt. Not that that is the problem...DH and DD have wanted him to adopt her for a few years. We just never thought her "DNA contributer" would have been willing to sign her over, so we never brought it up.
    toughluck08

    Comment by toughluck08 (original poster) at 1:41 PM on Oct. 4, 2012

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