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5 Bumps

Serious question about divorce and telling my 5 yr old...

How do I explain it to her that we are leaving? She thinks the two of us are going to visit friends, which we are for the weekend. I will have to tell her by myself after we get there, for safety reasons.

What do I say to her? Please advice is needed here.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 7:36 PM on Oct. 4, 2012 in General Parenting

Answers (6)
  • Awww, my heart goes out to you & her. Honestly, I don't know if there's a perfect thing to say or anything that will make it hurt less for her. I guess just say, "We're going to stay here now because it'll be better for us".
    3libras

    Answer by 3libras at 7:41 PM on Oct. 4, 2012

  • I would just be as honest as you can without scaring her. I'm going to assume "safety reasons" means you're leaving an abusive relationship. So I would just be honest and say that it's safer and better for you and her that you leave where you are. I would be honest that you are getting a divorce, and explain what that means (you won't be living with Dad anymore, things will change, but you still love her very much, etc.). Let her ask you any questions she has, and answer them as truthfully as you can.

    Good luck!
    wendythewriter

    Answer by wendythewriter at 7:41 PM on Oct. 4, 2012

  • I would just reassure her that you are not going anywhere, and how much you love her, that you are leaving to protect her from harm, I am sorry but proud of you for doing something to help you and her.
    kimigogo

    Answer by kimigogo at 7:45 PM on Oct. 4, 2012

  • We, as in you and her. Are not going to live with daddy any more.

    louise2

    Answer by louise2 at 8:42 PM on Oct. 4, 2012

  • My oldest son was six when his dad and I divorced. I just sat him down and told him that we both still loved him but that we just couldn't live with daddy anymore. He had seen a lot of arguing between his dad and myself. So I told him that it was better for us to move out because then we wouldn't fight and we could all be happier. Good luck. It is a difficult situation.
    Amanda0712

    Answer by Amanda0712 at 9:38 PM on Oct. 4, 2012

  • We aren't going to live with daddy anymore. Daddy and I both still love you, we just aren't going to be married to each other anymore.

    The more upbeat and matter of fact you are about it, the better she will take it. My kids were 4, 5 and 8 when I left - they had no problem with it.
    missanc

    Answer by missanc at 12:28 AM on Oct. 5, 2012

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