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My role as a step-mom. Or how to be a good step-mom.

I'm not sure where I stand or where I fit. I mean, I'm excited to be a part of her life. Maybe too excited and that's the problem. I find myself picking out clothes to buy her for our house at stores we go to then talk myself out of it cause I don't know if that's my place or not. We only get her once a week and that's an issue too. But I don't know what I can and cannot do. My fiance and I have talked about in regards to discipline and other things but basic terms I dont know what I'm doing?

Any tips on how to be an awesome step mom. She's a year old, by the way.

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SaraD1989

Asked by SaraD1989 at 3:03 PM on Oct. 11, 2012 in General Parenting

Level 18 (5,457 Credits)
Answers (14)
  • She's still very young. I think buying some clothes for your house is reasonable. Eases the amount of things he needs to pick up and bring back with her. If you have talked to your fiance about things, what is it that you don't know? I would just treat her as though she is your own for the time she is with you. Love and support her and be understanding of any confusion or anxiety she might have. You'll be fine.

    QuinnMae

    Answer by QuinnMae at 3:07 PM on Oct. 11, 2012

  • From the mother's perspective, always have your finance speak directly to the mother.
    3libras

    Answer by 3libras at 3:08 PM on Oct. 11, 2012

  • I should add that for the time being, we only get her once a week, on Fridays. I think that has a lot to do with it. How can I be a good step mom if I only see her once a week-is my thought.
    SaraD1989

    Comment by SaraD1989 (original poster) at 3:09 PM on Oct. 11, 2012

  • Stop considering yourself a step mom and just focus on being the best mom for the time that you have her. You don't have to label yourself as a step mom. She knows who her mother is. You just need to be the best mom at her dad's house (or wherever you have her for visits). Just like you would if you only had your child for one day a week.  IDK, maybe I am missing something and there is a special way a step parent is supposed to act. 

    QuinnMae

    Answer by QuinnMae at 3:24 PM on Oct. 11, 2012

  • I just don't want to over step boundaries. It's hard for me not to push my own personal parenting onto her. For instance, we dont' have milk in our house. It's hard for me to say no milk for her, cause that's not my decision to make. I love her as my own, and I find myself saying "my daughter" when I talk about her. I'm just not sure if that's ok or not.
    SaraD1989

    Comment by SaraD1989 (original poster) at 3:30 PM on Oct. 11, 2012

  • At 1 yr old see needs milk, it should be the majority of what she drinks.

    So, no you can not push your parenting on to her. She's not your child, period.
    Her mother & father need to agree to a parenting plan.
    3libras

    Answer by 3libras at 3:41 PM on Oct. 11, 2012

  • *she, not "see". ^^^
    3libras

    Answer by 3libras at 3:41 PM on Oct. 11, 2012

  • be yourself
    smiley745

    Answer by smiley745 at 3:54 PM on Oct. 11, 2012

  • Yes, a one year old calf needs milk. Not any age HUMAN.
    SaraD1989

    Comment by SaraD1989 (original poster) at 4:29 PM on Oct. 11, 2012

  • She needs calcium & a LOT of it.
    3libras

    Answer by 3libras at 4:37 PM on Oct. 11, 2012

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