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4 Bumps

Why is sex important in a marriage or relationship?

Shouldn't your spouse love you whether or not you have sex. Sex is for reproducing. We have one child who is 10 months old, we haven't had sex since right before i found out i was pregnant. Why is this so bad ? I just don't get it. I do not feel any closer to my husband after sex than i did before we had sex. I mean you just lay there with someone and get used for fun then go to sleep i'm not sure how that is influencing the importance of a relationship.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 1:58 PM on Oct. 12, 2012 in Relationships

Answers (43)
  • Intimacy, physical contact, orgasm, physical release, the rush of endorphins, etc.

    I'm taking it that sex is somehow not satisfying for you since you claim to "lay there" and "get used for fun". Why aren't YOU having any fun?
    PartyGalAnne

    Answer by PartyGalAnne at 2:47 PM on Oct. 12, 2012

  • Sex is the most fun you can have without laughing. If it isn't, you're doing it wrong.
    hootie826

    Answer by hootie826 at 2:47 PM on Oct. 12, 2012

  • Something is wrong with you hormonally,because your body should be craving it,even if just for masturbation.
    butterflyblue19

    Answer by butterflyblue19 at 2:50 PM on Oct. 12, 2012

  • I meant that i don't see how the act of having sex makes you any closer as a couple on an emotional level. It's not terrible but i could think of things i would rather do. I doubt we are "doing it wrong" I just would rather enjoy a hot bath or nap...I don't need to spend every single night having sex to enjoy my spouse is all. I guess everyone is just different and I am weird lol
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 2:53 PM on Oct. 12, 2012

  • I feel like people who think men want sex to bond and get closer to you are a bit off....everyone knows men want sex for the physical act of it....they don't care who it is what they look like
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 2:54 PM on Oct. 12, 2012

  • The act releases feel good hormones that bond you two
    Semen helps with depression
    Sex with ejaculation helps men fend off prostate issues
    butterflyblue19

    Answer by butterflyblue19 at 2:56 PM on Oct. 12, 2012

  • In our relationship, sex is not the most important thing... If something were to happen where neither of us were healthy enough for sex we would still have a very healthy and happy marriage. But, to us sex is still important. It is an intimacy that only we share with each other. It is a physical release and feel good.

    If you agree on the amount of sex with your Hubby then that is between you and him and no one else. However, it is concerning the way you view sex "just lay there with someone and get used for fun then go to sleep." Regardless of the number of times you are intimate, that does not seem like a healthy perspective on sex.
    saphire_eyes802

    Answer by saphire_eyes802 at 2:58 PM on Oct. 12, 2012

  • maybe something is wrong with me hormonally then because I don't feel good afterwards i just feel dirty about it, that's why i choose not to unless we decide we want another child
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 2:59 PM on Oct. 12, 2012

  • Is your husband the only one you have had sex with? Have you achieved orgasm?  This could be a simple case of not knowing what you are missing. 

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:05 PM on Oct. 12, 2012

  • While sex in and of itself is not important intimacy is vitally important to a marriage and sex is a form of that. My husband and I do not have sex often, but we are both fine with that so as long as you are both okay with the frequency then so be it.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:31 PM on Oct. 12, 2012

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