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how to be tactful and not hurt his feelings? (baby name)

Ok so now that we are pretty sure it is a girl (due in July) I have asked my husband to help me think of names. I like names like cadence, lydia, Jade, etc... obviously a little different but pretty- musical. So he has started helping and I am soooo happy he is giving input, but I HATE his name choices... Julie (which i could handle if we could use Juliana) Laura, Stephanie.... sigh.. so I am so glad he's helping I don't want to tell him I can't stand those names, I know if i do he'll shut down and stop helping-
also just for the record- he shot down every name idea of mine with an "eh"
I need help reaching a compromise... not all of my name choices are unusual. My current two children are named Krista Lynn, and Faith Elizabeth (different father)... so I am open to compromise....

 
LuckyClown

Asked by LuckyClown at 3:43 PM on Feb. 9, 2009 in Just for Fun

Level 1 (3 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (7)
  • My DH had no trouble telling me he hated the names I picked so I had no trouble telling him. Our kids are lucky they have names! You'll figure it our. Try first agreeing on a first letter, meaning, or origin that may help you to narrow it down some. Or make one list each then make a big list narrowed by yes no and maybe. If either of you says no, it is in the no column.
    But_Mommie

    Answer by But_Mommie at 4:30 PM on Feb. 9, 2009

  • Just be honest. Honesty if the foundation or my marriage. I told my dh when I hated all the names he picked out.
    kboney29

    Answer by kboney29 at 3:52 PM on Feb. 9, 2009

  • Honestly I think respect and commitment is the foundation of any marriage...


    You can be honest if you do it respectfully and stay committed to find something you both like.


    We have had a girls name picked out since we got married.  It wont happen :)  All men in his family.  But we just kept at it with boy's names until we found something perfect.  If you are  brain storming, I don't see the nescesity in saying "I hate what you are coming up with" because if you do you might stunt his creative thought and miss out on something you would have really liked, kwim?

    CooksWife

    Answer by CooksWife at 3:57 PM on Feb. 9, 2009

  • Maybe just explain to him what type of name you're looking for. Or be open to using one of his very ordinary names as a middle name...
    Silvertears1275

    Answer by Silvertears1275 at 4:05 PM on Feb. 9, 2009

  • my husband and i went threw baby names yesterday and there's a lot of names he liked and i didn't, and vice versa, but we pulled up about 5 different web pages of baby names and went threw a ton. And we had a pen and paper ready, and if he absolutely hated them, we didn't write them out, and if i absolutely hated them, we didn't right it out no matter how much the other one loved them. I just couldn't imagine one of us calling our child by a name we absolutely hate. But we did end up with a small list of girl names and a slightly larger list of boy names that we both kinda like. So now we just need to go over those names and decide what we like the best and go from there. But I'm sure a compromise can be made some way. Maybe look into more names, or sit down with some baby books and write down your favorites and have him do the same and compare notes. It'll work out.
    FinleyFirst

    Answer by FinleyFirst at 4:13 PM on Feb. 9, 2009

  • Julie and Laura are beautiful, as are the names you mentioned. I wonder if you could use his selection as first name and one of yours as middle name? This would be a fine way of honoring your husband's choice, especially since you invited him.
    Bmat

    Answer by Bmat at 4:56 PM on Feb. 9, 2009

  • Thanks to all of you, The husband and I both made a list and then went through the lists and deleted the NO names. I think this will work out. believe it or not Gabriella was on his list... and he did not delete Phoenix from mine...haha... I think this will work out. (fret not- the child will more than likely not be named Phoenix- though I do know a wonderfully sweet person of that name)
    LuckyClown

    Answer by LuckyClown at 5:18 PM on Feb. 9, 2009

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