Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Electronics Am I the Only One?

My daughter 17 fuses because her friends always have the newest electronic devises and some are poor. I'm sorry but I can't validate buying a three hundred ipod, cell phone, or spending more on a personal lap top for her. She says we're poor and even those who live in poor conditions and buy used clothes because they have to have these things. Are there others out there that don't feel their teen or child needs to have these things? She recently got a go phone, before we shared a cell phone.

Peace, <>

Answer Question

Asked by JoyceTN at 10:23 AM on Feb. 10, 2009 in Teens (13-17)

Level 4 (54 Credits)
Answers (15)
  • It is a learning lesson for them. My 13 yo son just got and iPod Nano. Everybody else in town has an iPod Touch. I tell him I don't care and those families are not teaching their kids the value of a dollar. Regardless of financial status, everybody wishes they had just a little more money, and they always will. They might as well learn to deal with it now as children.


    Answer by Anonymous at 10:33 AM on Feb. 10, 2009

  • My thought on it is that if a child wants it bad enough he/she needs to figure out how to work for it. These are luxuries, not necessities. I don't think it's necessary to a child's survival to have an ipod or personal laptop computer. As long as they have access to a computer to do their homework and a radio to listen to music they are fine. Some people might argue that a cell phone is necessary in this day and age but I would think that something functional you can call home with would suffice. None of this fancy camera phone with a million minutes, unlimited texting and five million "apps" is necessary. My husband doesn't necessarily agree with me. He tells me that at the age of 28 I need to get over my aversion to technology and stop acting like an old lady. I don't have an aversion to technology. What I have is a healthy respect for someone who knows responsibility and can get past today's automatic sense of entitlement.

    Answer by sillyt at 10:38 AM on Feb. 10, 2009

  • At 17 why doesn't she have a job? I had all that stuff as a teen because I bought it myself. I got my first full time (under the table) job at 12. By 17 I was working full time for a restaurant, part time for my mother's cleaning company and still going to school full time... If she want's all that stuff, let her buy it. My kids sure will.

    Answer by SabrinaMBowen at 10:40 AM on Feb. 10, 2009

  • My parents had a lot of money when I was growing up. I had everything I needed. But once I was that age, my parents told me they would pay for what I needed, I had to pay for what I wanted. Of course, I would get all kinds of things for my birthday and Christmas. But if I wanted some new CD or something and I didn't want to wait for my birthday or Christmas, I had to buy it myself. I had a job that didn't get in the way of school. It was a good lesson for me. Tell her to get a job if she wants that stuff.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:43 AM on Feb. 10, 2009

  • Sabrina,
    I totally agree she needs a job unfortunately with the economy the way it is and living where we live there are not many jobs. However I will also admit that maybe if she made more of an effort. At any rate I won't buy her this stuff, she has her go phone will limited time each month along with gas money to go to and from school and lunch money. Hey I've done my part, anything else is on her totally agree.

    Peace, <>

    Answer by JoyceTN at 10:46 AM on Feb. 10, 2009

  • We choose not to buy our kids electronic games. The only games they have ever had are computer games. My son is probably the only kid in his class that doesn't have a Gameboy or whatever they are called, but he makes excellent grades, can carry on a very intelligent conversation with adults, and plays outside most of the time. I see too many kids who are like zombies. They can't function without their electronic toys. (I know some grown-ups like this too!!) They have never had TV's in their bedrooms. We get them a cell phone when it becomes a safety when they start driving or have extra curricular activities and need to be able to contact us.

    One thing that drives me crazy are the DVD players going every time the car is cranked up. Who needs to watch cartoons on the way to school? Parents, turn off the electronics and talk to your children. And NO, your kids will not be harmed by not having everything out there.

    Answer by kittensandpup at 10:48 AM on Feb. 10, 2009

  • Kids have to learn that money does not grow on trees. They can not have everything just because they say "I want that". Because when they become an adult, they will have to live on their income and might not be able to buy these fancy thing You were able to buy them. Tell her she can save her money up. Or go get a job and buy the items. She is old enough to get a job.

    Answer by louise2 at 10:57 AM on Feb. 10, 2009

  • SEVENTEEN? I'm sorry but the second my daughter turns 16 and totally able to drive she wants the newest coolest fanciest things she is going to be told to get a job. She is thirteen now and already told if you want better, more, expensive, honey get a job. If she ain't willing to work for it, then she don't need it. My job as a parent is to provide her with the necessity, food, clothing, housing, and anything she needs for schooling and her after school activities.

    Answer by TheFriskyKitty at 12:20 PM on Feb. 10, 2009

  • My daughter is a bit younger 13 almost 14 but she already knows that she isn't going to get this stuff. She has never had any game system. She does have access to this computer and plays a few games on it. She has a pay as you go phone an mp3 player, and digital camera. All of which were in expensive and not top of the line. The idea is to teacher to be glad for what she has and to see the value of a technology vs. the marketing. For example, the phone, what she has meets the need she has. She doesn't need a 3G network. She's not going to be serfing the net, etc on her phone. The mp3 holds enough songs for her to listen to.

    Answer by teamquinn at 1:08 PM on Feb. 10, 2009

  • Some have mentioned about getting items such as these for birthdays and Christmas and that is exactly what we do here. I do not buy them games systems however their grandparents have for Christmas and it belongs to all of them. Games are only bought on the days mentioned above. I will not have my children thinking that they will get everything handed to them it will only prepare them for an unrealistic future. I just wanted to see if I was the only one who thought this way it's nice to know I'm not. Oh and see did get a $40 mp3 player for her birthday, but no ipod.

    Peace, <>

    Answer by JoyceTN at 2:21 PM on Feb. 10, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.