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If you had a miscarriage in the past, how soon did you tell people you were pregnant again?

I have had 3 miscarriages and we now know the problem. I have a clotting problem so now I am on 40 mg of lovenox a day. Well I really want to tell everyone I'm pregnant but I feel like I keep letting everyone down. I'm pregnant, I'm not, I'm pregnant, I'm not, I'm pregnant, I'm not, and now I'm pregnant. My first visit is March 1 and I'll be 7 weeks so I'm thinking if I get a good ultrasoud then I will tell then. So how far along were you when you told people????

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lisab7982

Asked by lisab7982 at 6:19 PM on Feb. 10, 2009 in Pregnancy

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Answers (15)
  • we waited till we were 12weeks. we miscarried once and told everyone and then had to go back and tell them sorry but we arnt anymore it was really hard on me and my husband so this time we waited till i was 12weeks and in the second trimester. good luck and hope things go well.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:21 PM on Feb. 10, 2009

  • I had a miscarriage in June. I'm now 20 wks and I told most people who are close to me once I saw a heartbeat on the u/s. Basically those are the same people I would tell if I had a miscarriage again anyway. I told others when I was in my second trimester.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:22 PM on Feb. 10, 2009

  • This is JUST me and part of who I am, not everyone has to agree. I believe that pregnancy, no matter how early, involves a beautiful new life that deserves to be celebrated. If I were to miscarry a pregnancy, I would be devastated and I'd want my friends and family to know why I was so sad and use that knowledge to be there to support me. People can't support you if they don't know what you're going through. They can't celebrate the short life the baby had and mourn the loss if they don't know about it. That's why I told people right away when I was pregnant and will the next time I'm pregnant too. I won't tell everyone I know and strangers on the street but definitely our parents, close friends and close relatives.  My mom and best friends would have a fit if I was pregnant, miscarried and never told them.  They'd want to know why I didn't let them and let them be there for me.

    NovemberLove

    Answer by NovemberLove at 6:30 PM on Feb. 10, 2009

  • ps good luck with your pregnancy!
    NovemberLove

    Answer by NovemberLove at 6:31 PM on Feb. 10, 2009

  • i was 13 weeks before i told anyone
    aliciatron

    Answer by aliciatron at 6:39 PM on Feb. 10, 2009

  • I have trouble deciding who to tell and when...we go to a large church and I wouldn't want to have to explain to EVERYONE, and rehash it every single person that wanted to talk to me. Everyone wants to come hug you and tell you how sorry they are even though you don't even know them, and it just makes for an awkward situation where I have to smile and thank them. It would be horrible, so we're waiting until I am 11-12 weeks along to tell anyone this time! I'm only 4 weeks now, and it's tough to wait!
    I am tempted to tell friends and family, but they can't keep their mouth shut, I know they'll be too excitedto do that. But if I had another miscarriage I would tell them so they could be there for me, but it wouldn't be as disappointing as "I'm pregnant" "oh yay" "oooh I'm not anymore..." "awe.."
    Get what I mean?
    Good luck mama!!!! I hope that medicine helps and you have a healthy pregnancy!
    MamaCatCat

    Answer by MamaCatCat at 6:42 PM on Feb. 10, 2009

  • Most people I know waited until the 2 trimester
    donismile

    Answer by donismile at 6:44 PM on Feb. 10, 2009

  • I dah a mc at 12 weeks and This time around I told everyone inlaws ans such on xmas day and i was 6w3 days and i am now 12w5d my mil told me you should have waited to tell everyone if this one doesnt make it.. i began to ball! how rude was that.. anyway (sorry typing with my 3yo on lap) thats up to you but keep in mind that as some one once told me on here "Don't burry the baby before anything happens"
    TravisJohnsmama

    Answer by TravisJohnsmama at 7:03 PM on Feb. 10, 2009

  • anon who had a mc in june and is 20w preggers right now, i think we must have a really similar due date, if you ever want to talk, contact me (i also had a mc in june, june 8 to be exact, and am now 20w preggers with baby no 6) I personally have had 3 mcs, 2 before my twins, no one knew about those pregnancies, the first one not even me until it was too late, and i had to deal with those losses all alone. the twins were successful, then after they turned 2, i was preggers again, and lost him in june. With this pregnancy, i waited until i opened my mouth to coworkers to tell them i was preggers and scared, then, i had to tell my grandma, maybe i told my coworkers so that i would have to tell her, as she works less than 50 feet from me lol (around the corner in a different part of the facility) but she would have found out pretty much asap had i not just told her, and i let her tell everyone else, just like with the mc, i only
    no.1twinmommy

    Answer by no.1twinmommy at 7:12 PM on Feb. 10, 2009

  • tell one person, and I know it will get around, my grandmother raised me, so it made it a little easier. I say do whatever you are most comfortable with, if you know someone who cant keep their mouth shut, tell them, let it out to someone, might as well let everyone be happy with you, rather than taking more happy time away in my opinion. And if the unthinkable happens, you will still have the support of those whom were happy for your gain, they will be there in the unfortunate event of a loss. Waiting until the second trimester is a popular decision among many women whom have had losses, and many more just wait for family to guess when you start gaining weight. I have loads of information on mc, so if you would like to know some statistics that will help you understand that you are definitely not alone, please, pm me, there is a lot women don’t know about mc. I will give you honest information, sugar coated and
    no.1twinmommy

    Answer by no.1twinmommy at 7:13 PM on Feb. 10, 2009

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