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Sports; do you think kids should be guided into them or just forget it of they don't want to?

Me personally, I'd like my boys (one step-son, one bio) in sports. Especially these days with so much trouble and violence. I think they need encouragement and some guidance. I think even if they really weren't too sure about it, atleast they tried it and I wouldn't make them play again next year. The bio-mom says I am pressuring him, I think pressuring would be forcing him to play year after year knowing he hated it. So please, tell me what you think. BTW, my step-son said he wanted to play baseball, then with his mother he just completely changed his mind, so his Dad and I talked with him about it, turned out he was nervous about not knowing the rules, we reassured him about practice's and learning, and at the end of the day, it's all in good fun and he wants to play, but she insists I pressured him into doing it... any thoughts??

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Asked by MrsG423 at 7:58 PM on Feb. 10, 2009 in Tweens (9-12)

Level 4 (38 Credits)
Answers (16)
  • well in your case I would just sit down with your SS and his mom and all discuss it together.

    Answer by ZaTa at 8:04 PM on Feb. 10, 2009

  • If they don't want to play a sport I would find an activity that they can do where they are guided, like a musical instrument. I wouldn't pressure them. I would say to them pick an activity that you would like to try, if it doesn't go well at the end of the season then we can pick something else. I agree that children need some guidance that their parents can't always give them.

    Answer by coala at 8:05 PM on Feb. 10, 2009

  • There's alot of stuff you can get him involved in that are great for physical activity and positive influences. Both of my kids are very into sports, they play soccer, baseball and basketball and want to play football this coming season. But you may also try tae kwon do.

    Answer by AprilDJC at 8:07 PM on Feb. 10, 2009

  • okay, not limited to just sports, anything music, singing dancing, chess class, an instrument an extra activity so he's not sitting around all the time, I think he should be guided, she thinks, no is no, he doesn't have to.

    Answer by MrsG423 at 8:12 PM on Feb. 10, 2009

  • There is more to playing sports than just the game itself. Children learn to work with others, they learn commitment, and they get good exercise. I think the idea of having them try it for a season is perfectly reasonable.

    However, it sounds to me like your ss is feeling pressure from both sides. Children don't want to disappoint their parents so he is telling you what he thinks you want to hear and telling his bio-mom what he thinks she wants to hear.

    How about laying the registration form out on the table with the "deadline" date circled. Tell him to think about it and let you know before that date.

    Answer by Dyndudes at 10:29 PM on Feb. 10, 2009

  • I do believe that kids should try a sport at least once. They are kids and do not know what it is like until they try.

    Now the rule in our house is if you since up you have to play the full season. I let them know this ahead time and if they actually don't like a sport then they don't play it the next season.

    If he is really unsure then you could have him go to a practice to see what it is like. Not sure if this is possible.

    Good Luck


    Answer by cornflakegirl3 at 2:45 AM on Feb. 11, 2009

  • I think any organized extra curricular is a good thing. Looks good on college aps the more you do. My daughter has asthma and gym coaches wont let her join a team becuz they have to run too much, so she joined a group called community advisors, they find things to do in the community to help people. They have bagged school supplies for kids in need, donated hundreds of meals to the local food pantries, and now we are accepting donated shoes to give to soles4souls to donate to people in need. It makes the kids feel great to help others, and its something other than sports. I say encourage them to do anything that involves team work, and gets them off the streets!

    Answer by lakegeorge_mom at 5:40 AM on Feb. 11, 2009

  • I think sports are great for kids, I have the same rule as cornflakegirl3, if you sign up for something you are required to finish it.

    Answer by sammiesmom2000 at 10:43 AM on Feb. 11, 2009

  • My kids are in some type of activities. My one son was born with a love of sports and his 3rd word was ball. My other son loved sports until they became more competitive and now he likes to help coach and does scouts. They both do bowling and I think my oldest will try golf when he is older. All kids should probably do something but not necessarily sports.

    Answer by partiesbyjan at 11:51 AM on Feb. 11, 2009

  • Kids being unhealthy is so common now, it's disgusting. I want all of my kids to play one sport per year. They can pick the sport, no matter what it is, but it has to be active. It doesn't have to be football, basketball or baseball. It can be dance, track, martial arts. Whatever they want to do that expresses their personality. I wanted to play hockey so badly in highschool, but there were so many kids that were experienced that it embarrassed me to be in front of them not knowing a darn thing about what to do. So I started watching it on TV and got Hockey for Dummies, and felt better about trying out the following season, and I made the team. You are right that sports give a positive outlet for a lot of things, and are a great influence on kids. Push the idea of sports, but not a particular one. And where Bio-mom goes, she has some say-so, but so do you and your step-son. Make her aware of that. Good luck.

    Answer by ktrog at 12:45 PM on Feb. 11, 2009

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