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Pleaseee help! :/

So me and my bf (now ex bf) had a bad falling out. to cut this short, after i broke up with him i spent a whole day trying to get him back, he was being soo cold towards me because of the break up. he told me to do whatever i wanted to do, so i did.. i slept with his close friend ( regretfully) anyway, he found out about it and of course he was furious about it even though he had every right to be upset, i also feel that in a way, if he wasn't truly done with me, then he shouldn't have told me to go do whatever i wanted. hes also mad at himself for telling me to do whatever i wanted just like im mad at myself for messing with his friend. the whole time we were together, we never argued. and now that we are broken up, that's all we do. we both have decided that maybe if we slept together one last time, we can take out all this anger on each other and lay this whole thing to rest. he was supposed to come over 2 nights ago but he had to work late, i texted him later that night asking him if he still wanted to go through with it and he texted back saying that he did and he was gunna come over today, well a few hours gone by and i havent heard from him so i sent him another text... he responded back saying he was sick. we spent all day texting each other about doing this and he said he was concerned about how he will feel after having sex with me, he says that hes afraid of getting the good emotions back and is afraid of the bad ones. i still love him and he says that he still has love for me as well.. all of this is starting to feel like a game and its all just soo complicated! its like he doesnt want me but he doesnt wanna REALLY let me go.. what do you think i should do!? PLEASE help.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 6:00 AM on Nov. 10, 2012 in Relationships

Answers (13)
  • How old are you and this guy?
    You do know you were wrong for messing with is friend. And he was wrong for telling you to go do whatever you want.
    This sounds like teen drama to me.
    louise2

    Answer by louise2 at 6:37 AM on Nov. 10, 2012

  • That's really vindictive to go after his friend. Guys are funny about those things. You probably don't have a chance in hell getting him back.
    texasgurl33

    Answer by texasgurl33 at 7:23 AM on Nov. 10, 2012

  • One word defines this relationship...TOXIC
    adnilm

    Answer by adnilm at 8:02 AM on Nov. 10, 2012

  • I don't think he ever really wanted you to sleep with his friend. So at thins point for Jim he cannot trust you or his friend. If that was truely his best friend he would not have slept with you. Your ex was hurt by both of you. He'll probably forgive his friend before you. So as I see it - its over.
    SassySue123

    Answer by SassySue123 at 8:06 AM on Nov. 10, 2012

  • And how do upu jump from "do whatever" to sleeping with his friend? There has to be more to this story. Your not telling us...
    SassySue123

    Answer by SassySue123 at 8:07 AM on Nov. 10, 2012

  • He's probably just mad that you screwed his friend - most people know that as a general rule, that's a big NO-NO. He doesn't have to still have feelings for you to be mad about that.

    As for the rest - who wouldn't enjoy knowing they could dangle someone like he's dangling you? You're basically begging, and he's enjoying having the power to essentially make you do anything he wants.

    I think you two are probably way better off without each other. Quit texting him, don't call him, move on with your life.
    wendythewriter

    Answer by wendythewriter at 8:21 AM on Nov. 10, 2012

  • This relationship sounds very dysfunctional. Go see a thrapist
    booklover545

    Answer by booklover545 at 10:45 AM on Nov. 10, 2012

  • I personally wouuld just be done with it. As stated above sleeping with someone's friend is usually frowned upon. It sounds like you may need to be on your own for awhile and get yourself together.
    hatagaj

    Answer by hatagaj at 6:10 PM on Nov. 10, 2012

  • Don't have sex with ANYONE. And frankly, the two of you need couples counseling. No sex with ANYONE till you've been through several sessions and the counselor tells you you may sleep with each other.
    gdiamante

    Answer by gdiamante at 7:40 PM on Nov. 10, 2012

  • You must learn to manage your anger without being spiteful and trying to get revenge.
    Sarah961

    Answer by Sarah961 at 12:07 AM on Nov. 11, 2012

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