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Hi i have a question about dating what is your opinion

I'm 21 years old and have a 3 year old daughter. Her father is a felon and we were only together for about a year. I made mistakes but I think I am getting my life together now. I have been raising my daughter and paying rent on our apartment. I have been thinking about dating lately so that maybe I could get married and have another baby. I know its crazy being a single mom and all but I have just been really craving a family. Is it actually possible that I could date or would it be harmful to my daughter? I know guys can be really sneaky and only pretend to like my kid so they can lure me into bed (they try anyway) so its just really scary for me because I don't want to make another mistake. I'm just wondering if it I possible to have a healthy meaningful relationship or am I doomed to a single mom sentence for life? (Or until she grows up)

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 8:02 PM on Nov. 11, 2012 in Relationships

Answers (12)
  • Yes you can have a healthy relationship but right now if you have doubts about it, you may want to give yourself more time.
    virginiamama71

    Answer by virginiamama71 at 8:04 PM on Nov. 11, 2012

  • I do not think you are doomed to be single but I do think that you need to be careful and choose well. Your daughter will not be harmed by a healthy relationship.
    Dardenella

    Answer by Dardenella at 8:06 PM on Nov. 11, 2012

  • You can date, and it won't hurt your daughter as long as you do it right. Don't introduce her to every guy you date, make sure you still spend plenty of time with her, and be picky about who you choose to date.

    But, if you aren't feeling confident about doing it right now, then don't do it. Take your time, and do it when it feels right.
    wendythewriter

    Answer by wendythewriter at 8:11 PM on Nov. 11, 2012

  • It's fine to date, but they shouldn't even meet your daughter until you know it's going to be a long term thing. That removes the problem of them "pretending to like her". If a guy doesn't understand that you have limited time to date or strict rules about when he meets your daughter, he's not the right guy.
    I was a single mom of 3 when I met my Prince Charming. He had never been married, never had kids and he was willing to take us on. We have been married 4 years n
    missanc

    Answer by missanc at 8:23 PM on Nov. 11, 2012

  • ow and have 2 more kids.
    Sorry, hit submit by accident
    missanc

    Answer by missanc at 8:23 PM on Nov. 11, 2012

  • Yes, but it doesn't sound like you are in it for the right reasons.
    m-avi

    Answer by m-avi at 8:34 PM on Nov. 11, 2012

  • As others have said, a healthy relationship won't harm your daughter. Don't introduce your little girl to every man you go out to dinner with. Also, the bar scene might not be a great place to look for men, since afair number of those kind are just out to lure you into bed. Try to meet men by doing things you enjoy, since you'll at least have something in common besides loneliness, which drives a lot of people to bars and nightclubs. Also, don't look too hard. You're probably not doomed to being a single mom forever, but worthy relationships tend to take you by surprise, when you aren't searching for one.
    Ballad

    Answer by Ballad at 11:06 PM on Nov. 11, 2012

  • It's okay to date don't make any harsh decisions too soon take things extremely slow so you can get to know the guys motive. There's plenty of single dads out there looking for love also.
    NuMomie12

    Answer by NuMomie12 at 1:42 AM on Nov. 12, 2012

  • You can date and not have sex with guys? You know that right?
    louise2

    Answer by louise2 at 8:05 AM on Nov. 12, 2012

  • Take it slow with men. Some will be friends and some will be booty calls. Booty calls will get tired of waiting for a relationship to develop and will move on. It's ok to show your daughter that having friends is important. One of those friends could be the one and if so it will develop on it's own. That part is healthy for her to see (of course not the sex part!). Seeing men come and go will teach her that men just leave us and not to trust them. So I vote for taking it slow with guys. See what develops
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 3:57 PM on Nov. 12, 2012

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