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3 Bumps

I hurt him... Will he ever forgive me? adult content

To start off, I have one child, and I am pregnant with my second. Very excited, by the way...
I met the love of my life when the father of my daughter (she's one and a half), left me. I was 10 weeks pregnant, and stranded in a strange town without anyone to help me. I was only 16.
A nice family took me in for the entire pregnancy. They helped me and did everything that they possibly could to make my life bearable. The person who rented the house had a 16 yr old nephew, and we became great friends. We fell in "love" or lust, and started sleeping together. He was truly my best friend. He was the only one there that I didn't think I could live without.
Well, 7 months pass, and we have been officially dating for awhile now. He was there through my daughter's delivery, and posed as daddy in all of our pictures. He was very upset when I told him that he could not be listed as her father on the birth certificate, because I felt that it would be too dishonest. Needless to say, he stuck around through everything, and he was a fantastic father, even at 16/17.
Now, fast-foward. We planned our second child, but things were not fantastic within our relationship. Because I still felt and acted young, I did not want to completely settle down, i guess. But I also loved him, and I did not want to admit that I was feeling like this. I told him that I wanted to let him live his life without us, at least for the remainder of this pregnancy. I wanted to give him the freedom he did not get because of me. So in turn, I would also be free. Selfishly, I didnt want to forever let him go... Just for awhile, I guess. (so stupid and childish)
He sat on our steps and cried. He begged me not to leave.
I began dating another guy, recklessly sleeping with him, and emotionally neglecting my parental duties. I realized that this man was not who I loved. I realized that he was bad for me and my family and we broke it off.
Now, four months later, I am desperatly hoping that my unborn child's father (the love of my life) will forgive me and try again... I needed to see the stupidity of my desicion. and I have. I really have... I am so sorry for everything that I put him through, and the pain I caused my family. I was so selfish...

If you were him, would you forgive me?
Note: I am due to have his son in 8 weeks.

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 2:57 PM on Nov. 13, 2012 in Relationships

Answers (9)
  • Well, have you told HIM this? What was his response?

    I guess there's no way for us to know if he will, or won't forgive you. I will tell you that if this question were reversed, and it was the man who pulled that, I'd be strongly suggesting you not take him back.

    Just my thoughts
    Mrs_Prissy

    Answer by Mrs_Prissy at 3:04 PM on Nov. 13, 2012

  • talk with him, he will let you know if he forgives you
    virginiamama71

    Answer by virginiamama71 at 3:05 PM on Nov. 13, 2012

  • Who's the daddy?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:07 PM on Nov. 13, 2012

  • Infidelity is very hard for most men to forgive.....but you won't know what he will do unless you go to him with the same story you told us...we all make mistakes, but sometimes male egos get in the way of such a reconciliation, hoping his is not that big and he can find it in his heart to forgive you..but you got to communicate this to him, not to us....

    older

    Answer by older at 3:46 PM on Nov. 13, 2012

  • You need to show him, either in person or in whatever way he will accept it, exactly what you wrote down here for us to see. He's the only one who can make the call. I hope he forgives you, but keep in mind that forgiveness is one thing, trust is another. It may take him a very long time to completely trust you again, even if you manage to rebuild your relationship. He sounds like a remarkable young man, definitely a keeper if you can pull it off.

    Oh, and another thing--I'm not saying this to be mean, but please make your life easier while you're still growing up and getting on your feet--go to Planned Parenthood or any clinic and get yourself on a reliable form of birth control. You don't need to keep raising babies while you're still trying to figure out who you are and what your life path will be.
    Ballad

    Answer by Ballad at 3:54 PM on Nov. 13, 2012

  • Wow
    Have a heart2heart with him and I hope you have sewed all your wild oats & don't hurt him again if he does take you back
    sarasmommy777

    Answer by sarasmommy777 at 4:07 PM on Nov. 13, 2012

  • You're one hell of a lucky woman IF he does forgive you. What kind of an idiot plans to have a kid with someone and then dumps him halfway through the pregnancy so she can go sleeping around with other people while HE is still taking care of a child of yours that he has no biological connection to? That's just cruel. I really really hope you DID learn the lesson and just aren't trying to get back with him because you'll be supported. Be prepared for the worse case scenario. You really need to get your act together and figure out how you're going to support your children if he doesn't forgive you.
    KristiS11384

    Answer by KristiS11384 at 4:11 PM on Nov. 13, 2012

  • HUGS and GL Momma!!! Its hard to make mistakes but if he can forgive you I hope you and he sit down and have a long talk about what you both want!
    pinkdragon36

    Answer by pinkdragon36 at 4:13 PM on Nov. 13, 2012

  • I don't know. It would all depend on if he still feels that same love for you and if he thinks he can ever trust you again. He must want it for it to happen though and he has to be able to let the past stay in the past. You should get tested if you were sleeping with the other guy before you try to move forward with the one you love (if he is willing), as well as to check for anything before the birth of your next child. I hope it all works out.

    QuinnMae

    Answer by QuinnMae at 4:44 PM on Nov. 13, 2012

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