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2 Bumps

Why can't I get over him???

Okay so if I gave you the whole story you'd be here all night reading so here's the short version. I have been seperated from my son's father for 2.5 years (my son is 3). He has been in and out my son's life going several months with only seeing him maybe once every few months. In this time period I got married and divorced within a year. Everytime I think i'm happy in a relationship he steps back into our lifes and it's like the guy i'm with doesn't matter anymore and all I want is him. I was madly in love with this man and he gave me a beautiful son. I had planned on marrying this man, he was my everthing. We were so happy until he has a weight loss surgery and lost over 100lbs and decided I was no longer enough for him. I can't seem to get over him and the way we ended things. I blame all my failed relationships on him and can't seem to get over him. What should I do and does anyone else have similiar experiances???? Please HELP!

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 8:02 PM on Nov. 17, 2012 in Relationships

Answers (9)
  • Marry him

    Answer by virginiamama71 at 8:10 PM on Nov. 17, 2012

  • Explain Why I should marry him. I'm lost.

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 8:14 PM on Nov. 17, 2012

  • Not sure how you should handle this. You tried other relationships/dating, even marriage and keep going back to this man, maybe he is the one you should be with.

    Answer by virginiamama71 at 8:18 PM on Nov. 17, 2012

  • Is he that in to you? Obviously not!
    You need to say focused on your new relationship - the more you throw yourself in to it, the less you will think of your old love! Your son needs a steady man in his life and seeing you will a "real man" will set a good example.

    Answer by madmueller at 8:19 PM on Nov. 17, 2012

  • Meooma is right on! What she said.

    Answer by tessiedawg at 9:00 PM on Nov. 17, 2012

  • What kind of man walks in and out of his son's life? Is that really the kind of guy you want? Is that a guy you can respect or trust?

    Think about those things....that should be enough to make you fall out of love with him.

    If he wants to see his son, arrange it so that you aren't there, get a fresh start. HE isn't at fault for your failed relationships, don't get into a relationship with someone until you have your act together. Just like you deserve better, so does any guy that is worth having a relationship with.

    Answer by ohwrite at 9:19 PM on Nov. 17, 2012

  • Walk away and stay away. If he wants to see his son make him get a court ordered visitation schedule AND state enforced child support. MOVE ON. Choose to be happy.

    Answer by booklover545 at 9:35 PM on Nov. 17, 2012

  • If you love him, and until you get over him, no other man will be good enough for you. The key question to ask yourself is: WHY did he leave you, and what is his excuse for leaving you and your beautiful son. He has acted selfish, and I'm not sure that this man can really make you or the kid happy. Good luck

    Answer by MamaaSutra at 9:41 PM on Nov. 17, 2012

  • Thank you all for your comments. We have not slept together since we split up so that is not an issue. He tells me all the time that he regrets his decision to let me walk out. I know he loves his son. He claims to still be having issues with getting his mind together. The surgery and sudden change caused him dramatic depression. My son doesn't get along well with other men. My son is in the hospital (he had neck operation) and his father has been here everyday helping me with him and bringing him anything he needs. I am in a relationship now but second guessing my commitment to him. (I was second guessing before baby daddy came back this time, it just got stronger when he did)

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 8:41 AM on Nov. 18, 2012

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