Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

5 Bumps

My seven year old's second grade teacher was disrespectful and down right mean at the parent teacher conference. What should I do?

The teacher called me by my first name, could not keep eye contact, and proceeded to tell me that my seven year old was "selfish, self-centered, rude and mean" which is an absolute shock, because my child is very sweet and sensitive. He continued to tell me that my child was "a mess" and that he had no interest or passion for school, and he simply does the work because its in front of him. That my child is the center of a lot of conflicts between students, which he then gave me an example for which my child stood up for another child. Unless I have a jackle and hyde child, I have reason to believe that my child's teacher does not like my child. I was so shocked and upset that I started to cry. what should I do?

Answer Question

Asked by tattooistmom at 7:57 PM on Nov. 20, 2012 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

Level 2 (11 Credits)
Answers (23)
  • Has your son told you anything negative from school?

    Answer by QuinnMae at 8:00 PM on Nov. 20, 2012

  • I would talk to my child and then consider talking to the principal and requesting a conference between the 3 of you.

    Answer by But_Mommie at 8:02 PM on Nov. 20, 2012

  • That sounds out of whack even if your child is having trouble in school. I can't imagine a teacher saying a child is a "mess." Contact the guidance department and get to the bottom of this teacher's history and what your child really gets up to at school.

    Answer by tessiedawg at 8:04 PM on Nov. 20, 2012

  • My son always tells me that he had a good day, and every once in a while tells me that another student was mean to him. Once he was terrified that his teacher was going to call me because he said "geesh" but his teacher thought he said "bitch", he was extremely upset about it. I'm not one of those " my child is the best" parents by any means. My child has trouble following directions, and he can be arguementative at times, but I have NEVER witnessed my child being mean and or rude to any other child or teacher. My child also said that one day on the playground he got hit in the head with a football and a female teacher called him a "whinner whinner forty niner" and his teacher actually laughed about it in front of me. I'm sorry, but when a child gets hurt, you don't call them a Whinner.

    Comment by tattooistmom (original poster) at 8:11 PM on Nov. 20, 2012

  • That's just wrong. Even if the child is having troubles in school, there are right and wrong ways to address these things. And if this has been an ongoing problem, why hasn't the teacher addressed it with you before this? I would talk to the principal and arrange a meeting with the three of you present.

    I've never had any issues with my kids' teachers until this year. My youngest dd's literacy teacher basically accused me of being the reason dd was behind in reading, saying in a rather snotty tone, "what are you doing at home to help her?". Normally I wouldn't have thought anything of it, but her tone was so snotty and condescending. My dd has several learning disabilities, and we've struggled for years with her reading. I do all I can to help her, and this teacher won't even follow her IEP! Some teachers just shouldn't be teaching young children.

    Answer by anime_mom619 at 8:12 PM on Nov. 20, 2012

  • I completely agree! If my child was so bad, why is this the first time I was hearing about it??? Anyone that knows my child knows he is nothing like what he said. Thinking about it now, I wish I would have said something, but I was fighting back tears. I actually feel bad for my child because he said it wasn't true and started to cry. I'm torn.... what if my child is different at school than he is at home?

    Comment by tattooistmom (original poster) at 8:19 PM on Nov. 20, 2012

  • Talk to the principal have him be a buffer find out what is really going on in the classroom.

    Answer by pinkdragon36 at 8:26 PM on Nov. 20, 2012

  • How is your son liking school? Does he complain? I would recommend you sit down with him and have a long talk about what's really going on. Yes, it is very possible for a student and teacher to just not get along... even though they are adult and child. My granddaughter is in 3rd grade this year and we had this problem twice now.... once in kindergarten and last year. We have to make sure we ask for a teacher that is very understanding and works well with ALL TYPES of students..... Yes, granddaughter is a talker... But so was I. LOL!

    If it's not an issue that can be worked out, by all means have him moved to a better teacher ASAP.

    Answer by m-avi at 8:51 PM on Nov. 20, 2012

  • I'm sure your child is exactly what they say about him. That is a lot of stuff to say to a parent and not think you wouldn't say anything about it

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:05 PM on Nov. 20, 2012

  • Even if all those things were true about your child, the teacher should not have handled it that way at all! Sounds like this teacher has issues and is either burnt out or past the point of caring about the kids. A teacher who doesn't care about the kids, or who is saying mean untrue things about them needs to be out of the classroom! I would go over his head asap! Have a meeting with the principal. Tell him what the teacher said to you. Request your child's teacher be switched. Your child doesn't need that kind of negativity around him, no child does!

    Answer by robyann at 10:36 PM on Nov. 20, 2012

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.