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2 Bumps

my birth mother never told my many brothers and sisters that i even existed. She is now very ill. How can I prove she is my biollogical parent in ca.

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Asked by kahli1948 at 8:09 PM on Nov. 20, 2012 in Adoption

Level 3 (20 Credits)
Answers (14)
  • It was a legit question. There are many reasons one can want to prove parentage when someone is ill. what you expect to gain from the proof would change the path you would want to take to obtain it.

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:33 PM on Nov. 20, 2012

  • adoptee and his/her natural family have no filiation. Which means by law they are legal strangers and therefore unless certain provisions are in place via written order of the deceased (will) there is no inheritance.

    Answer by vampporcupine at 9:45 PM on Nov. 20, 2012

  • If someone is willing take a DNA test with her or one of your siblings.

    Answer by Princess_s21 at 8:16 PM on Nov. 20, 2012

  • Why are you trying to prove your parentage at this point? To get in the will? To gain the respect of your siblings? To be able to see your mother in the hospital...?

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:17 PM on Nov. 20, 2012

  • To anonymous: keep your rude questions to yourself. If you cannot answer the question like an adult then go back to Facebook

    Answer by vampporcupine at 8:26 PM on Nov. 20, 2012

  • Talk to one of her other children you can prove she is your mother through sibling DNA . Are you that far in the talks with them?

    Answer by pinkdragon36 at 8:29 PM on Nov. 20, 2012

  • in my state you would have to wait till after she has passed away .Then you would need to present her obit or death certificate to an agency that has the ability to look at OBC or if it is the agency that handled the adoption provide a notarized copy of your DL also then they will contact any children she had to see if they want further contact.

    I don't live in Ca. ,  this may give you a start.It should be in your state statutes.

    Good Luck


    Answer by drfink at 10:13 PM on Nov. 20, 2012

  • I faced this too with my Mom's rejection and denial of me to her kept kids. I was asked by a sister, 'why should I believe you- a stranger- over my mother'? I had one sib who was willing to go to the agency with me to verify I had found the right family. CHS wanted to play MORE head games. Refused to confirm or deny directly...but bro could write a letter for them to place in my files, and then I could call and ask if there was anything new in my file. ??!? It absolved them of any accountability. Jerks
    I had held back sharing my non-Id with sibs. I finally sent them a copy and a couple of pics of myself. Her background info matched perfectly and the pics were proof in the pudding. I hope you are able to put yourself out to the sibs before moms condition worsens. My mom held back in fear of what her kids would think about her. As soon as she was confident that they still loved her, she opened up to meeting me. Good luck.

    Answer by adopteeme at 3:24 AM on Nov. 23, 2012

  • Have you been in contact with her? If so, do you have emails or letters from her written to you? I have encountered something similar before and the adopted person had waited six months after her mother passed and then wrote a letter to her siblings telling them that her and mom had been in contact for __ long and although she knows that their mutual mother had not disclosed her existence to them, that she would like to take the opportunity to open the door for contact. If you want contact before her death and if your siblings are adults, you have every right to speak with them directly as they are your siblings. Good luck and I'm sorry to hear of your pain

    Answer by vampporcupine at 8:21 PM on Nov. 20, 2012

  • You could do a DNA scan but why do you need to prove it
    Unless she agrees you will have get a court order and that will take a good long while. I am assuming that she will not acknowledge you as her daughter even now? If she will and she is of sound mind then I believe all you would need is a notorized statement/ deposition by her and then registered in a court of law. If it is a matter of inheritence it could be contested unless you have DNA.

    So it again comes down to why you want to PROVE it.

    Answer by Dardenella at 9:00 PM on Nov. 20, 2012

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