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2 Bumps

Help! My Kindergartener is hitting at school and I don't know what to do!

My son just started hitting and getting into trouble this past week and I just do not know what to do about it. I have talked to him plenty about it and he has lost privledges and been punished but that doesn't seem to be helping. I don't know what else to do!! The school has a counselor- I wonder if that would help at all for a 5 year old???? The teacher seems at a loss too. We do have a crappy home dynamic- we husband has a 10 year son from previous marriage who is home 1/2 the time each week and treats my son like crap (long long story) but that has really been the case for my son's entire life so that is not a change or some new event in his life....

I just don't know how to address this. He does not hit at home. He is independent and stubborn at home but nothing too terrible or destructive like his teacher describes.

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 10:05 AM on Nov. 27, 2012 in General Parenting

Answers (6)
  • Just because it isn't a change doesn't mean he isn't lashing out now. He could be taking his frustrations with his step brother out on the other kids at school because he can't do anything about it at home. You might also look at situations that might be happening at school. Have their been any changes there?
    kmath

    Answer by kmath at 10:07 AM on Nov. 27, 2012

  • You have talked to him, but have you talked with him about it. If you are going into the discussion from a disciplinary standpoint, it could be that he's afraid to talk about it or he feels you are unwilling to hear him. It could be that he doesn't know how to verbalize what he's feeling. I would meet with the counselor at school to see if she has any ideas how to get him to let you know what's going on.
    hootie826

    Answer by hootie826 at 10:27 AM on Nov. 27, 2012

  • What does he say when you ask him why he hits his classmates? And yes, involving the counselor at school is a good idea. He not only needs reinforcement that the hitting is wrong and unacceptable, he needs the tools to deal with the anger or frustration he is feeling without becoming physical.

    QuinnMae

    Answer by QuinnMae at 10:38 AM on Nov. 27, 2012

  • I would make a personal phone call to the school Counselor & speak to them about it ASAP. Tell them your concerns & maybe they can see him weekly at school & get to the bottom of the issue. They may have recommendations for how you can handle this at home too. This is their job & expertise. GL!

    ILovemyPaulie

    Answer by ILovemyPaulie at 10:42 AM on Nov. 27, 2012

  • Great advice and thoughts from previous posters. I would only add that if there is a crappy home dynamic the counselor can hopefully start there and help you move forward. Best of luck.
    tessiedawg

    Answer by tessiedawg at 10:53 AM on Nov. 27, 2012

  • Have you asked your son what is going on? Talk to him. He may not understand all of what he is feeling but he can describe what is going on and from that maybe you can figure out what the triggers are. Also talk to all the teachers get as much detail as possible. Could it be that he has trouble with social skills? Or understanding school work?
    booklover545

    Answer by booklover545 at 2:57 PM on Nov. 27, 2012

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