Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

4 Bumps

Joint custody ?

If you have joint physical custody with 1 week/1week off schedule, does the summer stay the same or is yours different than the rest of the year? And how are holidays in your plan? Please share your week on/week off schedules...Thanks!

Answer Question

Asked by ANR1390 at 2:01 PM on Nov. 27, 2012 in Parenting Debate

Level 4 (30 Credits)
Answers (10)
  • our only 1 week on 1 week off is during the summer. our son is school age and I home school so he is with me Monday morning 9am until Friday at 4pm.

    we simply alternate holidays or split the day when possible. My ex and I are still very good friends so we are more relaxed than most. if one parent needs him for a vacation away or a special day we work to accommodate that schedule.

    Answer by Tesserae at 2:07 PM on Nov. 27, 2012

  • depends on what you worked out on the custody agreement. I have my kids every day bu Friday nights and we alternate holidays

    Answer by LostSoul88 at 2:41 PM on Nov. 27, 2012

  • Each parenting plan is different and may need to b changed as the children grow.
    I am primary for DGS The parents are aloowoed alternating weekend at my discretion the mother may never have DGS more that one 24 hour period in a row (court order)
    We have tried Dividing weeks and It simply does not work. DGS really wants to live with his father and part time with us. During thesummer the father is allowed 2 consecutive week or visitation greater than that as permitted by TPR (me)
    He has had him for a month with no problems and he comes back and is ready to go. I make sure he sees his moter though that is a struggle. everytime and after this last it is supervised only for now.

    Each it different according to the needs of the child and parents.

    Answer by Dardenella at 3:14 PM on Nov. 27, 2012

  • May I say that this arrangement is not for everyone, that's my two cents.

    My ex and I switch the kids (ages 7, 8, and 11) every Fri. at 6 pm. Summers are "as parents agree," and we stick to the every other week as during the school year. Holidays are every other year and our papers specify who has odd years and who has even years. We each get the kids on our birthdays every year. The kids' birthdays are to be split according to our papers or as parents agree so we just celebrate the birthdays separately each on our week with the kids. Christmas vacation from school is broken up into the week before and the week after, each parent gets a week and we switch at 2 pm Christmas Day. Oh, and each holiday starts at 6 pm the night before so if I get them for Easter, he brings them to me at 6 the night before.

    Answer by HHx5 at 4:58 PM on Nov. 27, 2012

  • Week on/week off throughout the year, including the summer. We alternate Christmas and Thanksgiving.

    Answer by kmath at 3:45 PM on Nov. 29, 2012

  • HHX5 what a detailed great agreement. No room for fuss. I really like that. Very clear.

    Answer by frogdawg at 8:02 PM on Nov. 29, 2012

  • lol, frogdawg, you have no idea, my dear! My ex and I hate each other and we try so hard to hide it from the kids. It is a detailed agreement because whatever wiggle room he has, he's already wiggled through it and I've taken him back to court although we settled it in mediation. A good attitude is key and it is what the parent's are capable of making it, key word capable. That is why I say this arrangement isn't for everyone.


    Answer by HHx5 at 9:36 PM on Nov. 29, 2012

  • When my custoday was set-up that way. My ex has my daughter the school year then I get her every other year for the major holidays,summer is one month out of the year,I get her mothers day also, then any other time I come to New York for a visit I can have her.(I live in Cali)


    Answer by Allmermommy12 at 12:56 PM on Dec. 5, 2012

  • I hate the idea of every other week visitation, keep are bounced back and forth. As for holiday I'd do as the standard orders say with even/odd years that goes along with the school calendars. example: this is an even year, so I'll have the kids during Christmas., when school lets out until Dec 27th at 6pm - he'll have them the rest of the vacation until school starts. Next year, it'll be reversed. But he had them on Thanksgiving because I have actual Christmas Day.
    The summer should be flexible with vacations, kids camps and sports taken into consideration. Remember as they get older they're involved in more and more - for my son it was first soccer, now football that starts at the beginning of Aug. My daughter will have band camp. Plus, I'd send them to a little summer camp two years, so you'll both have to able to compermise around that stuff.
    Good Luck

    Answer by SassySue123 at 8:41 PM on Dec. 5, 2012

  • I have custody of DGS. We tried 1 on and one off and it did not work. However the plan was the same in the summer and rotating holidays (specified by year) basically 1 with, 1 without, Birthday dicvided in half and mother's day to mom andfather's day to day along with their birthdays.
    As I said this is no longer the case though the holidays my son and I generally share, MOM atm is allowed 1 hour supervised by DFS once each month and they will schedule it so she has the hour for certain of those days. I expect her to file again.

    Answer by Dardenella at 3:35 PM on Dec. 13, 2012

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.