Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Should DH join the Air Force at 27 yrs old.... wife & twins??!! ADVICE PLEASE!

My husband and I have been contemplating him joining the Air Force. He's 27 and will be 28 in Oct. He's been told by the recruiter that it's not too late if he wants to join. He has already made up his mind that he wants to join, he's just waiting on ME to give him the "OK". I AM SOOOOO TORN. I SERIOUSLY NEED SOME ADVICE. We live in a small town in Alabama, he works for a potatoe chip company. He makes pretty decent money, but he has ALWAYS wanted to go into the military, he just chose me over the military 4 yrs ago. He wants to better himself, he is such a passionate man, he gets sooo excited when he talks about it. I am trying to figure out if it is worth it, to pack up w/ my 3 1/2 yr old twins and change our lives forever. My husband questions if I can handle him being gone? How the heck am I supposed to answer that?? I DON'T KNOW!! What is it like raising children in the military? JOIN OR NOT?

Answer Question
 
JessicaGrizz81

Asked by JessicaGrizz81 at 10:18 AM on Feb. 12, 2009 in Money & Work

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (12)
  • I was raised in the military and I had a blast. Yep it is hard when they are deployed and away but like my mom says you get used to it and used to doing things your own way and then when they get home its another adjustment to him being back. I say go for it. He wants to do this and if hes that passionate you dont want him to see you or the kids as a reason he never fulfilled his dreams.
    gemgem

    Answer by gemgem at 10:21 AM on Feb. 12, 2009

  • I think you need to support you MAN on this one. You got a good one. No it won't be easy, but it will be worth it.
    kemclaughlin

    Answer by kemclaughlin at 10:24 AM on Feb. 12, 2009

  • "He wants to do this and if hes that passionate you dont want him to see you or the kids as a reason he never fulfilled his dreams. "

    That's exactly what I'm afraid of. I don't want to hold him back from doing what he wants to do in life. I"m a sahm, and I support my husband. Yes, I know I have to consider my family. We only have very little time to make this decision, or he will be too old to join. I want him to be happy. I think that the kids and I could adjust. I'm not the type of wife that thinks that he should do whatever makes ME happy. I want him to be just as happy.
    JessicaGrizz81

    Answer by JessicaGrizz81 at 10:25 AM on Feb. 12, 2009

  • Then looks like you have your answer. Plus when hes enlisted you will get housing and meet so many other moms out there and they are really a great support system.
    gemgem

    Answer by gemgem at 10:26 AM on Feb. 12, 2009

  • My husband is a Marine. However, he has been out for several years and we didn't have our son until years after he finished. But, he works in the oil field. Before he became a Mud Engineer, he would be gone for 7 days at a time. It was horrible for him and our son. They missed each other like crazy. I missed my husband and he missed me but dealing with that was okay. The being away from his child is what killed him. Like I said, he is a Marine and not a very emotional person. But he cried daily when he talked to our 2-year-old to tell him goodnight. It's not easy on anyone. It's something nobody can answer for you. It depends on what your family can handle. The oil field is great money but he said it wasn't worth it if he couldn't see his child every day. I agreed with him. Our hopes and dreams are wonderful goals but our children are much more important. I think you should talk to a pastor or therapist first.
    DDry

    Answer by DDry at 10:27 AM on Feb. 12, 2009

  • Well, he definately would miss our kids for sure. We talked about that last night, I asked him if he could be away from the kids. His answer was " of course, I don't WANT to be away from my kids, but if I have to deploy, then that's part of it.". He is such a dedicated person, but at the same time, he's devoted to his kids, and me. He's willing to make sacrifices.
    JessicaGrizz81

    Answer by JessicaGrizz81 at 10:32 AM on Feb. 12, 2009

  • Anybody else???
    JessicaGrizz81

    Answer by JessicaGrizz81 at 11:27 AM on Feb. 12, 2009

  • My husband was in the Air Force for 14 years. It had its moments where life was stressful, but I do not regret it and it gave us a great life which has kept rewarding us after he got out a couple years ago. My husband was gone here and there. Sometimes for 2 weeks, 6 weeks and sometimes for months at a time. I just made sure to have a life outside of him and kept busy while he was gone. The benefits were good and I enjoyed traveling to new places. We always looked at life as an adventure. My husband and I really bonded when we would move to a new place and only have each other for awhile until we made new friends. My niece that we raised followed in my husband's footsteps and she is now in the Air Force. She absolutely loves it! My oldest son is considering it as a career once he is finished with college. If this is something that your husband has a passion for I would say support him 100%.

    Magpie75

    Answer by Magpie75 at 11:35 AM on Feb. 12, 2009

  • Join. We are retired AirForce. If I could do it over again. I would.
    RidingPink

    Answer by RidingPink at 2:58 PM on Feb. 12, 2009

  • My son is AF. He joined 3 years ago and is now ready to cross train, meaning that he went in with one job specification, and now he wants to move into another job. He has not had to deploy. Many Airmen go to Afganistan for 5 months.
    Your airman would go for boot camp in San Antonio, TX for, if I remember correctly, 6 weeks. They do not get to call home much and they are really tired and worn out ( a good tired, tho.) If he is stable emotionally, and doesn't have physical problems, he should make it thru just fine. The weak minded and foolish boys get in trouble and hate bootcamp. My son loved it and came out stronger, more physically fit, and mentally fit. He is stationed in NC (his home state being GA).
    The Air Force bases are super nice. (at least the 3 I've visited.) They are landscaped very nicely, their shopping stores are nice and terrific to find nice things. I think the AF is perfect.
    lifeasinoit

    Answer by lifeasinoit at 8:18 PM on Feb. 12, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.