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5 Bumps

I'm a grandma,and not happy

So my little girl 15 is pregnant and I was wondering for any moms out there who've been in my shoes,how did you help your daughter raise her baby?
I'm trying to be supportuve through every aspect of this journey and trying hard to stay positive.
Were already struggling just to keep our kids fed and trying like hell to keep our mortgage paid,and were in debt over our heads with medical bills.
My lil girl wants to keep this baby,she seems really excited,though I'm not sure why,she was ogling newborn babies in the store yesterday and it made me sick to my stomach just thinking about it all,cause I shouldn't be a grandma yet!!
I;m stressed about all the things she's going to need,crib,clothes,diapers,a car! I just pray to god that her parents are supportive when they learn she doesn't want to have a family adoption.
How did you moms get through this with your prgnant teenaged daughter?


Asked by Anonymous at 10:52 AM on Dec. 12, 2012 in General Parenting

This question is closed.
Answers (58)
  • Ask her where the baby is going to go while she's at school. If she answers "I don't know" tell her CPS will take her child away if she "doesn't know" where he/she is. For the next week, wake her up every hour and make her stay up for at least 45 minutes then send her to school the next day. Don't let her nap after school, make her wash dishes and do laundry. She's probably not thinking of these things.

    Answer by maecntpntz219 at 11:26 AM on Dec. 12, 2012

  • So you're okay with her not working full time...who's paying for this baby? Me?

    Answer by FreeForAll at 11:37 AM on Dec. 12, 2012

  • I agree that school is more important right now. If you don't make her go now she might never finish.

    Answer by Hollyhock. at 11:38 AM on Dec. 12, 2012

  • I don't understand. Is she your DD or not? What does this mean: I just pray to god that her parents are supportive when they learn she doesn't want to have a family adoption. ?  Who are these parents you speak of?  

    As for how to support her?  I really don't know.  I am sure she can get on some kind of public assistance like WIC.  That should help.


    Answer by QuinnMae at 10:59 AM on Dec. 12, 2012

  • Well, that's a start. I think ultimately that since the decision is all hers, the consequences need to be all her's too. I think coming up with your own boundaries (speak with your SO / DH / partner about this and be in agreement) and sticking to them is the first and most important thing you can do. Remind her that going out with friends and doing all of the things that her friends are doing on Friday and Saturday night are not things that she will get to participate in unless she gets a babysitter (not you) to watch the child. I'm sure these things are much easier said than done. Hopefully a counselor will be able to give her some insight as to what she can expect. I would not make it easy or comfortable either.


    Answer by QuinnMae at 11:30 AM on Dec. 12, 2012

  • My dd was 13. I found out a lot, like I couldn't make decisions for her (legally) about what to do with her child. I went through my anger period. I was a single mom of three and struggling. I made it clear to her that she was the mom and she would have to figure a lot of it out for herself but I would guide her (and drive her!) It was an adjustment but we made it. So many turned against her in the family. No female should ever go through pregnancy alone. I couldn't turn my back on her. I had to help her mature quickly and educate her so it wouldn't happen over and over. I went to counseling to keep from taking my anger out on her. It wasn't about me. It was about her and how to teach her to be a good mom, no matter what her age was. She's now a grown woman and so is her child! You can get through this. btw, I was not happy being a grandmother at 38 but it grows on you. People adjust.

    Answer by admckenzie at 12:06 PM on Dec. 12, 2012

  • why are cowardly anonymous people so damn annoying and have no cuts to call BS them self instead of hiding. I guess anonymous is oblivious and dont believe teens get pregnant.

    What ever you do OP, Good Luck.

    Answer by LostSoul88 at 12:27 PM on Dec. 12, 2012

  • Be a better parent

    Answer by KristiS11384 at 10:58 AM on Dec. 12, 2012

  • I'm confused, are you the pregnant childs Grandmother, or Mother? There are places you can get assistance, just check with your local family services, churches, etc. There are second hand stores everywhere, and WIC. You'll just have to do some homework before the baby gets here if you're planning to help her out. GL

    Answer by MrsLeftlane at 10:58 AM on Dec. 12, 2012

  • Ladies, back off. How can you say for certain this isn't a real question? Geez.

    I have no advice since my dd is only 5. Good luck to ya'll.

    Answer by texasgurl33 at 11:11 AM on Dec. 12, 2012