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Did you know...??

That when a husband gets along with his wife's family, the couple is more likely to stay married.
When the wife gets along with the husband's family, the couple is more likely to get divorced.
Anyone else got a rock solid relationship like me? lol DH gets along with my family, and I have been banned from Dh's family!
Poor screwed up family. MIL was a shitty mom, did drugs and slept around, pawned her kids off all the time, emotionally abusive. She threw a hissy fit on FB about us not being up her butt anymore like we used to be- ya know, now that we are grown with jobs and I am in school full time, oldest DD is in school,etc; we dont have as much butt kissing time for her anymore. So in her hissy fit, she said she "suffered and sacrificed" for her kids and they dont even love her anymore...DH confronted her, told her to stop the sillyness on FB and talk to him like an adult if she had an issue...she was not working at the time and knows where WE live...she could always come here instead of expecting us to drop what we are doing, pack up 3 kids, and drive 20 minutes to her house. Anyways, she whined to the whole family about how terrible we were being to her and we have been cut out of the family! Nevermind the majority of the family do drugs, have criminal records, in and out of jail and mental hospitals,pull guns on their spouses in the presence of kids,steal from eachother, claim all the guys in the family rape them, steal other's gifts at family christmas parties...I mean, this is a movie worthy family....anyways, just wanted to vent. Kinda getting irritated with the situation. She abandons her kids and does drugs their whole life, and the minute they stand up for themselves they are the black sheep? I think the only person who can understand that logic is someone who can write a prescription to cure it! Just sucks around the holidays we have been excluded from their family events. I do not care, DH is jumping for joy we dont have to go, but my kids will miss seeing their cousins :( My heart hurts for them.

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 4:58 PM on Dec. 13, 2012 in Relationships

Answers (9)
  • Have a cousins only holiday sleepover so the MIL and trashy family can get high in peace?

    Answer by feralxat at 5:12 PM on Dec. 13, 2012

  • Sounds like you're better off and they've done you a favor - one you should have done for yourselves years ago.

    Answer by Ginger0104 at 5:14 PM on Dec. 13, 2012

  • lol good idea feralxat, but I'm not sure they would allow their children around us....ya know...with all the not doing drugs and lack of criminal record...they may think we are a bad influence or something...
    Ginger, we are better off, and I know my husband says he does not care one bit, but surely if your whole family turned their back on you for something soo...stupid....when others are welcomed with open arms who have done much much worse...that has to hurt. It would hurt me, but I am super close to my mom and family, and had a normal loving childhood...but my kids do not know what is going on...funny thing is, they have not asked to see their Nana (MIL) but have voiced concern over not seeing some of the cousins children...oh well nothing I can do about it. They are young enough to forget and move on.

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 5:20 PM on Dec. 13, 2012

  • I was ok with his family (other than one aunt) and in fact - I was friends with his sister before I met him...

    He does not like my mother or her side of the family- but was ok with my dad and his side...

    We have been together 21 yrs

    Answer by charlotsomtimes at 5:44 PM on Dec. 13, 2012

  • The theory is that, when a wife and mother in law get along, the mother in law is more likely to intrude on the family and not respect boundaries. The wife will be too afraid to set strict boundaries in fear of harming the relationship, and eventually may get fed up with MIL, causing marital strife, especially if the husband is close to his mother, and will lead to divorce. When there are healthy boundaries, things are friendly, but MIL and wife are not "BFF", things seem to work best. With the husband, if he gets along with the wife's family, he will feel a sense of loyalty to them, and not want to lose them, and is less likely to mess things up--on his end. If he does not get along with the family, that seems to have no effect, just things go better if he does. If that makes sense.

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 6:13 PM on Dec. 13, 2012

  • My husband generally gets along with everybody. His family and I don't deal with each other, and my family is out of our life because they are assholes. We're solid either way. We've been married 15 years.

    Answer by JulieJacobKyle at 10:20 PM on Dec. 13, 2012

  • Hmm. That is very interesting. My dh gets along with my parents better than he does with his own. And we don't talk to or see ANY of his side of the family. Not since he quit drinking years ago, and since my MIL showed her true colors after her dh died a couple years ago. His family resembles the OP's in a lot of ways... We have been married for almost 24 years.

    Answer by 29again at 11:12 PM on Dec. 13, 2012

  • Dh gets along great with my family and I get along great with his and we've been married for 24 years.


    Answer by beeky at 7:09 AM on Dec. 14, 2012

  • well my mate family are drunks n liars cant stand them...

    Answer by smiley745 at 1:43 PM on Dec. 15, 2012

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