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5 Bumps

80 levels of wrong: fired due to boss with poor self control and a jealous wife

Short version - dentist decides he's sexually attracted to his employee, confesses to his wife, they go to church for counseling, and decide the best way to save their marriage is to have a church counselor present when he fires the employee for jeopardizing their marriage.

Iowa Supreme Court: Firing Attractive Female Employee Because Of Wife's Objections Is Not Sex Discrimination

In Nelson v. Knight, (IA Sup. Ct., Dec. 21, 2012), the Iowa Supreme Court upheld a decision by dentist James Knight to fire Melissa Nelson, a dental assistant who had worked for him for over ten years, after Knight's wife became concerned that Nelson posed a threat to their marriage. Knight was becoming personally attracted to Nelson and he feared he would eventually try to have an affair with her if he did not fire her. Knight reached the decision to fire Nelson after he and his wife consulted with the senior pastor of their church. Knight arranged for another pastor from the church to be present and witness the conversation in which he fired Nelson, and also a subsequent conversation he had with Nelson's husband about the firing.  The state Supreme Court held that the firing did not amount to gender discrimination. AP reports on the decision.


The ALL-MALE Iowa court sees absolutely nothing wrong with this. Hopefully she takes this federal, and wins.

Another link for those with an aversion to the FOX/AP link used in the original article:


Maybe someone else can explain this to me - how on earth is it NOT discrimination to fire someone because you find them sexually attractive?

Answer Question

Asked by NotPanicking at 4:47 PM on Dec. 23, 2012 in Politics & Current Events

Level 51 (421,174 Credits)
Answers (23)
  • My real problem with all this is WTH is everyone ASSuming that the lady would have had the affair with him in the first place? Just because she spoke to him doesn't mean she was attracted to him. I get that kind of sentiment alot with the girlfriends of some of my guy friends (and a wife or two). They seem to think the only possible reason I could have for talking to a man is because I want to have sex with him. I assure you, it is not! Thankfully, MOST of the guys who are married don't get that kind of crap from there wives.
    Also, WTH did the "counselor" (read: brainwasher) need to be there? Moral support? Who really needs moral support in the room with them to fire someone? It had to be, at best, embarrassing and, a worst, demeaning. I HATE when people think that pastors are liscensed counselors. All that is telling this man is the next time he gets a woody from a girl, have her fired. Problem solved.

    Answer by spiritguide_23 at 12:34 AM on Dec. 27, 2012

  • He wasn't "honest" with her. He tried to place on her his inability to control his sexual urges. It's called being. A Real man and a grown up.

    Answer by sahmamax2 at 9:34 PM on Dec. 23, 2012

  • I read this and found it disturbing yesterday. So does that mean you can not hire for being too attractive? I hope the higher courts decide to review this case. It sets back wonen's rights by oh ..... a hundred years or so. Seriously what a stupid ass employer.

    Answer by frogdawg at 9:28 PM on Dec. 23, 2012

  • I support the courts decision. She might have had better luck with sexual discrimination...but they went with gender discrimination.

    It is HIS office and he gets to decide who works there. If I employed someone that I found myself increasingly sexually attracted to...I would let them go too. He could have been a jerk and written her up for several minor infractions and then fired her. He didn't. He was straight with her and gave her a months severance pay.

    Answer by yourspecialkid at 8:47 PM on Dec. 23, 2012

  • After 10 years,he fired her because she wasn't attracted to him! What a messed up world we live in.

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:12 PM on Dec. 23, 2012

  • Gee,better hope that his barista at Starbucks isn't too hot or his wife will push to get her fired too....
    I hate this argument that a woman being hot and a man getting turned on is HER fault.
    Ya,you know how once a man gets hard,he just HAS to have sex with her or he'll die on the spot
    I'll bet the rest of his employees are freaking out thinking they're next.
    good luck finding a bunch of male hygienists. Oh,and they better be straight too,or he'll be tempted to turn gay....eyeroll

    Answer by butterflyblue19 at 7:02 PM on Dec. 23, 2012

  • I know of a couple currently going through this BS called "Soulmate Essentials" through the church. The first tenant:

    "If having a healthy marriage seems impossible, it's because it is. But, we have a loving Heavenly Father who wants to make it possible. We believe the number one essential of a healthy marriage is to allow God to control our lives. Our number one goal is for you to ... Trust God"

    Taken from the website. Allow God to "CONTROL" your life.

    Answer by 3libras at 5:49 PM on Dec. 23, 2012

  • Yea it's scary that they don't teach accountability and self control to the men. And the women? Submit submit submit.-to the husband at all times. It's sick IMO.

    Answer by sahmamax2 at 5:40 PM on Dec. 23, 2012

  • This is akin to saying the woman got raped bc she wore a short skirt. Putting the blame onto another. If I was his wife I'd kick his dumbass to the curb.

    But, they don't. This is the problem with church counseling. They literally preach to keep the marriage going at all costs & that outside evil temptations are the problem (not the actual spouses). It's scary stuff.

    Answer by 3libras at 5:25 PM on Dec. 23, 2012

  • This is akin to saying the woman got raped bc she wore a short skirt. Putting the blame onto another. If I was his wife I'd kick his dumbass to the curb.

    Answer by sahmamax2 at 5:07 PM on Dec. 23, 2012

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