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What would you do?--some venting sorry adult content

I invited my one sister here over a month ago to come for Christmas and she gave me the excuse that her vertigo was acting up and that she wouldn't be coming into town(she lives in Detroit Michigan and I live in Grand Rapids, Michigan) and then find out today that my other sister that lives in Grand Rapids also had invited her and that is where is at.

She was there for Thanksgiving Day also, and had told me that if she came in town for Christmas she would come to my house(and also told my boys that she would be here for Christmas) and then she pulls this. It pi$$es me off so much that my other sister always has to butt in but if I say anything then I am being childish and need to grow up according to them. She has even had the balls to say to me that she knew I would react this way and be pi$$ed about it(I think I have every right to be).

She called yesterday and said she was coming to my house today(which I didn't invite her today I have other company coming later this afternoon and have to prepare the food for them). So would you just stop asking her to your house or what? and how would you tell your 5 and 10 year old that they won't be seeing their aunt anymore? Just don't know what to do anymore husband says to just write them off and not invite them anymore.


Asked by Christmaslver68 at 7:28 AM on Dec. 26, 2012 in Relationships

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Answers (5)
  • I agree with your husband, sweetie. You don't deserve that crappy treatment.

    Answer by texasgurl33 at 7:31 AM on Dec. 26, 2012

  • Why didn't all of your talk to each other and make a decision on who's house all of you would go to for the holiday?

    I would not stop inviting either sister.  Just do not expect them.  Tell your kids the truth.  "I invited aunt____, but she might not come."  As in you do not expect her to show up.   Give them a certain time to be at your house. Then go about your day.


    Answer by louise2 at 7:37 AM on Dec. 26, 2012

  • she had me in tears all day yesterday because of promising and then pulling this stunt

    Comment by Christmaslver68 (original poster) at 7:33 AM on Dec. 26, 2012

  • Family members tend to beat to their own drum. I have learned over the years that my husbands family RARELY come to visit us, we always end up driving 7 hrs. plus to see them but it is NEVER done in turn back. I am tired of doing it! I am to the point now where it's their darn turn!
    Just don't give them a second thought! Until they actually grow up and can make the decision to come see you - just take a deep breath and let them go!

    Answer by madmueller at 10:43 AM on Dec. 26, 2012

  • Christmas and family gatherings are typically the source of much tension, as fragile
    relations, preferences, biased opinions etc tend to be revealed.
    Also, since we haven't met many family members for some time, being exposed to
    a family environment and see everyone's likes and dislikes is not easy....

    You witnessed your sister's preference and this really hurt your feelings... The communication issue
    about her coming, then cancelling and then coming again just verifies what your husband advises you to do.

    For some reason your sisters distance themselves from you.
    Your homework now is to consider WHY.
    Is there an age difference? Are you better off than them? Is she single or less happy in her marriage?
    You know the answer to this.

    Answer by MamaaSutra at 2:55 PM on Dec. 26, 2012

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