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Am I normal for not liking when people throw two parties for one child?

My husband has several family members that throw two parties for their children, one for their child's friends and one for family. This drives me crazy because we get invited to both which are usually in the same weekend and then I am expected to do the same for my kids. Is this a common practice? Growing up we either had a big party with friends and family or I had a party with my friends and that was it. My grandparents would visit me at some point and give my my gifts. What is everyone's thoughts on this, thank you.


Another problem is the people that have 2 parties have a small family so having a seperate family party is no big deal, if I were to do that it'd be a party of 30+!



Asked by jesslsch at 10:43 AM on Dec. 27, 2012 in Entertainment

Level 4 (33 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (11)
  • I don't see a problem with it. I can understand doing one for family and one for the child's friends, I generally don't invite people to both parties, but I can see inviting someone I was very close to to both or someone in the family who had a child the same age to both. I'd probably tell them not to bring a gift to both parties though, that I was just inviting them for their company!

    Answer by ohwrite at 11:10 AM on Dec. 27, 2012

  • to each his own, you dont have to go to both and what people expect and what you do is totally up to you.

    I would just tell SIL or BIL that you can't do both and whoever expects you to throw 2, tell them NO

    I know people who do that and I tell them thanks for the invites, we will come to this party...and leave it a that .

    Answer by luvmygrandbaby at 10:50 AM on Dec. 27, 2012

  • to each their own...if i had to go to both i'd still only buy one gift. i will only have 1 for each of my kids

    Answer by josiesmommy00 at 10:54 AM on Dec. 27, 2012

  • I'd be questioning why I was getting invited to the friend party if I was family. I wouldn't go to 2 parties for the same kid. Never dealt with that myself.

    Answer by idareyou at 11:05 AM on Dec. 27, 2012

  • We have several parties. One for friends from school and one for just close friends and family. "Party" is not what I would describe the family gathering. More like we ordered a pizza, grabbed a few chips and drinks, and picked up a cake. Then we have some family over for dinner. Really low key and relaxed. In some cases my son gets more than two. This year he had one at the beech with my husband and my husband's family. Then when he came home we had a small friend, the friend's parents, his sitter, and his aunt with a cake. Then we had a bigger party with ten friends at a local pool. The beach party was planned, the house gathering was spontaneous, and the kid party was because he likes his friends coming over. If I do not want to go to a party I simply decline. You can too. It really is odd being invited to both but just say no thank you.

    Answer by frogdawg at 11:38 AM on Dec. 27, 2012

  • We have two, one for friends and one for family. We travel out of state for the family party.

    Answer by funlovinlady at 11:39 AM on Dec. 27, 2012

  • I would just attend the family one. No way am I buying every child in my family 2 presents just because they have 2 different birthday parties. And yes, do what you want with your kids. If anything, maybe just do a small cake thing with the family and then an actual party with friends. That was always pretty common in our family, but never 2 whole parties.

    Answer by maecntpntz219 at 11:34 AM on Dec. 27, 2012

  • Seems a little over the top to me. We alternate years. On even birthdays they get a party with friends/family. On odd birthdays they get a small party with grandparents.

    My family is beyond dysfunctional, and no one talks to anyone. My husband's side, though, is about 30-40 people, just his siblings, their spouses, and all the cousins. He's the 5th of 6 kids, and my kids have 12 cousins to play with.

    Answer by Rosehawk at 12:36 PM on Dec. 27, 2012

  • We only have one party for DD, but that is only because we don't really have a lot of friends and family without kids that want to come to her parties. So we have a kid party and invite DH's our friends with kids around DD's age...and that's it. If we did have more people interested in the fact that it was DD's birthday, we would definitely have more than one party.

    Answer by AllAboutKeeley at 1:05 PM on Dec. 27, 2012

  • I've been trying to figure out how to do the birthday thing this year, since my daughter wants a party for her preschool friends, and I'd like to keep it apart from her other party. The reason for that is she wants a pinata and kids' games, or a McDonald's gathering, and I can't afford to do it for her family and church friends as well as the ones from school. I wouldn't invite people to both parties, though, that seems a little ridiculous. Why have two if you invite the same guests?

    Answer by Ballad at 1:18 PM on Dec. 27, 2012