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3 Bumps

Controlling with me, free spirit with friends' wives

OK girls, here's some venting now! I am so upset, i could walk all the way up to Canada!

My husband demands to see the tickets that i booked for my mother to visit us
and subsequently cancelled cause he was screaming about her staying with us, and all the expenses n stuff.
He even told the neighbours that "she's staying here forever" which she was not.

He asked me for the ticket money plus the 4% bank charges and I promised in WRITING to repay
him in full, plus bank charges.

Now he screams and demands to see the ticket reservations. I have the email reservations but I am upset
because he controls my life without helping me when i need him.

He shouts and i told him that a) the bank statement will have the ticket transactions (debit and credit after cancellation) and b) that i'll give the tickets to his lawyer.

I feel stubborn right now, as I perceive HE IS VERY CONTROLLING. He shouldn't ask to see the tickets: He made me cancel them for money reasons, he asked even for the bank charges (how petty !!!) and i havent' seen my mother in 2 years. And yet, he really-really-really likes and admires his friends' wives, although they have never worked, and control their husbands' income.

Do you think he has the right to see those tickets?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 11:34 PM on Jan. 1, 2013 in Relationships

Answers (19)
  • You need to just get the fuck out of there. Period.
    For what POSSIBLE reason would you want to be with this man?

    Answer by PartyGalAnne at 11:41 PM on Jan. 1, 2013

  • PartyGal, thanks so much!

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 11:46 PM on Jan. 1, 2013

  • you don't have to pay back anything... the money is marital asset... it belongs to you too!! Screw him... get out NOW!!

    Answer by Crafty26 at 11:50 PM on Jan. 1, 2013

  • Crafty26, thanks. I may not run all the way to Canada after all... I feel much better ! So i'm not insane after all !

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 11:51 PM on Jan. 1, 2013

  • : (
    I just think this scenario is really sad. What is wrong with him? No, he doesn't need to see the tickets and he can call Visa to see the credit back or whatever plus the 4 percent. I'd go home and visit mom on my own if it were me. What he did was just mean and disrespectful. I get not being able to afford the ticket but then don't buy it to begin with. Don't ask to cancel it once it's purchased plus interest and humiliation. Asshole.

    Answer by jeanclaudia at 11:51 PM on Jan. 1, 2013

  • He's an ass and if he were my husband I'm tell him to F off!

    Don't let him treat you this way! You're better than this!

    Answer by PMSMom10 at 11:57 PM on Jan. 1, 2013

  • I agree with the other ladies.

    Answer by Dardenella at 12:03 AM on Jan. 2, 2013

  • He JUST said the MONEY IS ALL THERE IN THE ACCOUNT, so now HE STILL SCREAMS and called me a liar, as he thinks i never booked the tickets.
    I guess the airlines already credited the account. BUT I don't know why he still screams if the money is there!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    Could it be a sign from God, that this man is BAD FOR ME ???

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 12:18 AM on Jan. 2, 2013

  • I think the first sign was when he started complaining about your mom coming to visit, since he has obvioucly already moved you away from family. Now he is trying to isolate you as well. Your marriage is well on it's way to becoming one of abuse. I would get out ow if I were you, before he has a chance to mentally abuse you anymore then he already has.

    Answer by spiritguide_23 at 12:33 AM on Jan. 2, 2013

  • Is this an isolated incident of this kind of behavior or do you have several examples? I really thing it is a red flag.

    Answer by jeanclaudia at 12:50 AM on Jan. 2, 2013

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