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5 Bumps

Hmmm, ever happened to any of you??? LMAO!!

During lunch at work last week, I ate 3 plates of beans (which I know I shouldn't). When I got home, my husband seemed excited to see me and exclaimed delightedly: "Darling I have a surprise for dinner tonight." He then blindfolded me and led me to my chair at the dinner table. I took a seat and just as he was about to
remove my blindfold, the telephone ☎ rang. He made me promise not to touch the blindfold until he returned and went to answer the call. The beans I had consumed were still affecting me and the pressure was becoming unbearable, so while my husband was out of the room I seized the opportunity, shifted my weight to one leg and let one go . It was not only loud, but it smelled like a fertilizer truck running over a skunk in front of a garbage dump! I took my napkin from my lap and fanned the air around me vigorously. Then, shifting to the other leg, I ripped off three more. The stink was worse than cooked cabbage. Keeping my ears carefully tuned to the conversation in the other room, I went on releasing atomic bombs like this for another few minutes. The pleasure was indescribable! Eventually the telephone farewells signaled the end of my freedom, so I quickly fanned the air a few more times with my napkin, placed it on my lap and folded my hands back on it feeling very relieved and pleased with myself. My face must have been the picture of innocence ,when my husband returned, apologizing for taking so long. He asked me if I had peaked through the blindfold, and I assured him I had not. At this point, he removed the blindfold, and twelve dinner guests seated around the table, with their hands to their noses, chorused: "Happy Birthday"..

Answer Question
 
Michigan-Mom74

Asked by Michigan-Mom74 at 8:49 PM on Jan. 2, 2013 in Just for Fun

Level 34 (66,351 Credits)
Answers (14)
  • Pics or it didn't happen! LOL!
    tessiedawg

    Answer by tessiedawg at 8:50 PM on Jan. 2, 2013

  • You have GOT to be kidding me???? NO WAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Did you die a thousand deaths? I would just die.
    jeanclaudia

    Answer by jeanclaudia at 8:59 PM on Jan. 2, 2013

  • OMG that is the most terrible thing I've ever heard!!!
    hatagaj

    Answer by hatagaj at 8:59 PM on Jan. 2, 2013

  • That's tooooo funny! LMAO!!! Oh, and no nothing's ever happened to me like that.......
    MrsLeftlane

    Answer by MrsLeftlane at 9:11 PM on Jan. 2, 2013

  • OMG - please tell me this didn't actually happen?! I'm dying of laughter over here! No, nothing of the sort has ever happened to me!
    idareyou

    Answer by idareyou at 9:13 PM on Jan. 2, 2013

  • lol@dare! Yes it did happen! My bff sent to me on FB...Oh yessss my tummy hurts soooo bad I laughed so hard!
    Michigan-Mom74

    Comment by Michigan-Mom74 (original poster) at 9:45 PM on Jan. 2, 2013

  • hahahaha
    madmueller

    Answer by madmueller at 10:07 PM on Jan. 2, 2013

  • Note To Self: ALWAYS ALWAYS check before I let one off if blindfolded!!!
    cassie_kellison

    Answer by cassie_kellison at 10:24 PM on Jan. 2, 2013

  • reminds me of the:
    listing to music on the bus and had to rip one
    silently ripped one to the beat thinking i was so clever only to remember i was listening to my iPod :(
    rotflmbo
    feralxat

    Answer by feralxat at 10:34 PM on Jan. 2, 2013

  • ROTFLMAO MM! That's too damn funny!
    I'm surprised no one snickered, lol
    PMSMom10

    Answer by PMSMom10 at 11:22 PM on Jan. 2, 2013

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