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Fiance's Family

My fiance's family has been pretty crappy to me over the last four years. Mostly, his mother. At first I was forced to believe that she just really disliked me, then when I broke down and moved out of the house he allowed his divorced mom to move in with us, his divorced male friend moved in, and I saw she was just spiteful. After I left now a year, I came to a realization that I need to be the bigger person and try to bring everyone together for the sake of my children. My fiance however wants me to jump right in and allow his mom to start babysitting for us. Might I mention she threw a knife at me when I was nine months preggo.

I wanted to start with dinner meeting up at chuck e cheese places like that here and there once a month (his parents are divorced and SHE does NOT get along with her ex) . I wanted to start out with his dad but he got mad and said no I have to do them at the same time, because his dad will brag to her. She was nasty to me (fake police report, stressful pregnancies, changing locks, breaking furntiure, relationship problems with my fiance) it is not as easy to get back on the saddle.

He is now like don't worry about it "i don't really like them anyway" and I feel like he's trying to be sarcastic and throw it in my face. His best friend that moved in after I left came to me and apologized beacause my fiance's mom always spoke so bad of me and made me seem like the worst person ever and he believed it, until he moved in and saw it was really her. I'm trying to do the right thing for my kids and live life the way God wants me to.

Where am I going wrong with this. I did it with good intents.

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 3:10 PM on Jan. 4, 2013 in Relationships

Answers (10)
  • I'd be getting a new fiance. The one you have doesn't stand up for you. Let's his parents treat you like dirt and you're going to marry him? I sure wouldn't. I want to be first in my dh's life not an afterthought.

    Answer by baconbits at 3:18 PM on Jan. 4, 2013

  • He made her leave and she is now living with her other son. She asked HIM to babysit but she does not acknowledge me. I see this as immature and a large problem. She doesn't have to like me but if she wants to be within the same room as my kids she will respect me.

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 3:20 PM on Jan. 4, 2013

  • This is not someone you want to be with.
    His mother throws a knoife ate you and his unborn son? And he does nothing but support her?
    You and he are living together and maing children (sort of smacks of some kind of permanancy) and she moves is and he is ok with you moving out instead of his mother moving?
    They do not get along. He knows this is doomed and yet he still insists on it? Why not say we will go with her first?
    This is a mama's boy and there is nothing you can do to change it, and she is not about to give him up.

    Answer by Dardenella at 3:22 PM on Jan. 4, 2013

  • the key word here is 'FIANCE", goodness sake's woman, run away as fast as you can!

    Answer by jerseydiva at 3:39 PM on Jan. 4, 2013

  • sorry I wouldnt be with a man who let his family treat me like that

    Answer by LostSoul88 at 4:37 PM on Jan. 4, 2013

  • I would get as far away from all these people as possible

    Answer by booklover545 at 7:18 PM on Jan. 4, 2013

  • You went wrong when you didn't break off with the whole family. If your fiance truly cared about you, he'd have cut his mother off. And reporter her to the cops.

    Real Men put the families they CHOOSE before the ones they happened to be born into. Your fiance didn't do that. He is NOT a Real Man and not worth your time. Get your support ducks in a row and move on.

    Answer by gdiamante at 12:45 AM on Jan. 5, 2013


    Answer by smiley745 at 11:08 AM on Jan. 5, 2013

  • Unless you train for a Las Vegas Show or the Circus, throwing knifes is not a good starting point for a meaningful relationship.
    Since your man supports her, I'd say take the kids and run....

    Answer by MamaaSutra at 2:39 PM on Jan. 5, 2013

  • if worst comes to worst and she does end up babysitting, the least you could do is video tape the whole thing. and if your kids are old enough to tell you things, even better

    Answer by lizzybee44 at 2:13 PM on Jan. 6, 2013

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