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4 Bumps

Why can't I have an orgasm during sex? adult content

Well my heading pretty much says it all, I have been married for almost 4 years now, and I have a little girl, but I haven't really talked to anyone about this before, it's kind of uncomfortable, but I hope you gals can give me some good advice, well every time me and my hubby have sex, I feel nothing, I mean sure I like it sometimes and it's nice... but haven't really felt the actual orgasm during sex, the only way i can get them is by doing it by myself, and watching porn :( but I don't want to keep doing that... I have to lie to my husband and tell him that I did have one just so he won't feel bad about it, but I really don't know what to do anymore, sometimes I'm not even in the mood for sex when I know I won't have an orgasm... has anyone experienced this before?? HELP! :(

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 2:02 PM on Jan. 6, 2013 in Relationships

Answers (14)
  • Very few women can orgasm from sex alone. I use a vibrator on my clit during sex if I want to have an orgasm.

    Answer by musicpisces at 2:06 PM on Jan. 6, 2013

  • You have the same problem i do.. Believe it or not more women dont have them then do.. A lot of women do lie about it. Why? I dont know its normal. You can get some toys that have a curve at the end and try to find your gspot. Only way i can orgasm is if i do it myself. I have a toy i use during sex and put it on my clit.. Here is a site that might help you understand a little more


    Answer by Anonymous at 2:08 PM on Jan. 6, 2013

  • Why can't you have your DH stimulate you with his fingers to make you orgasm. Teach him what you want.

    Answer by ILovemyPaulie at 2:13 PM on Jan. 6, 2013

  • Most women do not and usually get it from foreplay.

    Answer by virginiamama71 at 2:17 PM on Jan. 6, 2013

  • You need to guide your man into getting you there hun, tell him what he can do to get you there, and of course return the favor.....

    Answer by older at 2:37 PM on Jan. 6, 2013

  • TIme to be honest with him; if you can't be honest with each other then you shouldn't be having sex.

    According to Psychology Today, only 25% of women can consistently orgasm during sex. So you are in the majority rather than the minority. Check out the article:


    Answer by gdiamante at 2:43 PM on Jan. 6, 2013

  • Same boat. At least you fake it. My DH just gets mad at me for it.

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:47 PM on Jan. 6, 2013

  • Me too. Been years! And fingers? no way! his fingers are so rough and always dirty. yuuuuck.

    Answer by staciandababy at 2:48 PM on Jan. 6, 2013

  • (TMI- you are forewarned)
    I always go on top so I can rub my clit on him as I thrust. This way I have a clitoral orgasm during sex. I also make sure we have plenty of foreplay so I am on the verge of orgasm before I ever mount him. The other thing is I had to discover his rubbing my thighs and back slowly and gently sent me over the edge. You have to talk about it so you can try new things to find what helps you get where you want to be.


    Answer by But_Mommie at 3:02 PM on Jan. 6, 2013

  • Much of it has to do with the position of the clitoris. I had no idea why I could never have an orgasm during sex until I got online and actually saw pix of clit positions. Some are on the outside of the body so get stimulated easily and can lead to an orgasm during sex. Many are more hidden inside so need more direct pressure. One suggestion is with you on top and him using his thumb to apply pressure directly to the clit. Another position is with him behind you leaning forward and again, applying direct pressure to the clit (or you applying the pressure). Good luck.

    Answer by admckenzie at 3:35 PM on Jan. 6, 2013

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