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Is it normal to feel this way?

i mean my 3 kids are from my previous marriage and i am pregnant again, my new hubby and i are expecting a boy but i am scared that he might treat this baby different than mines.. because we will have my kids and our kid.
what can i do to prevent that my kids will grow up feeling like they are different than their brother?
My hubby treat my 3 kids the same, give them so much love and discipline as well( not the confrotable with that anyway), my kids call him daddy so...

Its like the other day we went to shop a few things and each of my kids wanted something, and my oldest choose something a little bit expensive and he was like: " hum.. she cant have that how can i give all the things that our baby need, if they always want some toy or something else?"... i didnt wanted to fight so i pretend i didnt heard him, so my daughter picked up something else...

How do you do ? is it normal? am i overreacting?

Answer Question

Asked by betinha at 2:54 PM on Jan. 7, 2013 in General Parenting

Level 9 (356 Credits)
Answers (17)
  • I dont think he was directing that comment because your DD isnt his. I think he was worrying about cost.

    Answer by LostSoul88 at 2:57 PM on Jan. 7, 2013

  • I have seen this before. I have friends with other kids from other men. Ask your self some thing. does your husband love your kids that you have now? Just remember if this is his first child he will be a little closer to the baby as only because its his first. A families bond is as strong as our thoughts. Our thoughts get the best of us some times. Like "is because he thinks Im fat" kind of thing. If you feel like your husband will be like this talk to him, if you can. Just remember that you can hurt his feelings so approach with care and he will understand if the two of you talk a lot about your relationship about everything in the family. Good luck hun!

    Answer by mck05 at 3:01 PM on Jan. 7, 2013

  • Yes you are it is practical to say no. The fact is babies are expensive and you will have to cut corners on everyone to provide for the baby. It would not matter if all 4 were his.

    Answer by Dardenella at 3:07 PM on Jan. 7, 2013

  • well, i had try to talk about it, because i dont want my kids to feel he love them less because we are having a new baby... he had show me how much he love my kids, he do everything for them... i know its his first baby but i dont him to use that as an excuse to spoil our baby boy... and yeah i know babies are expensives, but we dont buy toys for the kids everysingle day.. and my daughter behaviour as been really good so i wanted her to choose something as gift for good behaviour that all!

    Comment by betinha (original poster) at 3:18 PM on Jan. 7, 2013

  • So 7 minutes after you're complaining about how you think your husband thinks you're lazy you are whining about him not letting your daughter pick out something expensive and thinking that it means he'll treat his child with you differently than the other 3 you have because you're pregnant and babies are expensive and he's trying to save.
    Did you just completely drop out of school when you got pregnant at 15 or did you simply not pay any attention in school, ever?
    He is already supporting you and your 3 kids. I think he's more than shown that he loves tehm all equally. But now another mouth to feed is being added to the mix, so yeah your kids aren't always going to get everything they want (especially if it's expensive) because that is money that can go to diapers, immunizations, clothing, etc for the baby, as well as for your other 3 kids.
    Grow up

    Answer by KristiS11384 at 3:29 PM on Jan. 7, 2013

  • im not saying that he doesnt love my kids equally but since i got pregnant sometimes he says or do things that makes me think he is not going to treat them the same as our baby boy!
    i got married at 15 and for my arabic and muslims traditions there werent a lot of choices, so yeah i went to school but didnt finish all! only when i went to a house tht helps mother like me that i made something similiar to GD for your informations!

    Comment by betinha (original poster) at 3:34 PM on Jan. 7, 2013

  • What country do you live in exactly? And I'm just guessing but your other children are all girls aren't they

    Answer by KristiS11384 at 3:39 PM on Jan. 7, 2013

  • i live in portugal but i was born and raise in yemen! no i have a 4 yrs old girl, a 2 yrs old boy and an 11 months old baby girl and expecting a boy. why?

    Comment by betinha (original poster) at 3:43 PM on Jan. 7, 2013

  • Well if you had all girls it would explain the obsessive paranoia that your husband would treat a boy differently.

    Answer by KristiS11384 at 3:52 PM on Jan. 7, 2013

  • How you were able to leave Yemen with your 3 children & your ex Husband let you take them???? That is un heard of. Am I right?

    Answer by ILovemyPaulie at 4:01 PM on Jan. 7, 2013

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