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3 Bumps

What do I do about my SO who shows me the door anytime we argue?

I know for a fact he loves me. I know for a fact he wants to be with me. And also we live together, meaning we both pay the rent, so who is he to kick me out. He only says it when he's mad, it's like his way to calm me down and re think or something, but either way I know its just his game and its getting old. We have been together 5 years but why does he keep doing this? He doesn't even mean it and even if he was, so what. That's why I'm saying his stupid little ploy isn't working so how do I get him to stop? It's getting old but it's not like it's such a big argument that I'm really going to pack my bags.
Also, if he really did mean it, and both our names are on the lease, how would that work, who would get to decide they want to stay?

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 2:10 AM on Jan. 10, 2013 in Relationships

Answers (28)
  • You wouldn't have to tell me twice. Take the door.
    PartyGalAnne

    Answer by PartyGalAnne at 2:18 AM on Jan. 10, 2013

  • Tell him he better not keep showing you the dor because one of these times really soon, you might just walk through it. That shit would get old fast.
    Ballad

    Answer by Ballad at 2:21 AM on Jan. 10, 2013

  • I have taken the door before, we broke up for 11 months, got back together. years later broke up for 3 or 4 months, got back together....etch this happened over and over. Im tired of breaking up I want to GROW up! We will always come back to each other I know it.
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 2:28 AM on Jan. 10, 2013

  • Fuck that! I'd be gone! His ass could pay for the lease!
    Who needs to live with that crap all the time!
    Quit going back to him!
    PMSMom10

    Answer by PMSMom10 at 2:32 AM on Jan. 10, 2013

  • Ha! I would put all of shit outside the next time he tells you to leave. Turn it around on him... he won't like it anymore than you do. And maybe it will be a wakeup call about how hurtful it is for him to say it.
    SleepingBeautee

    Answer by SleepingBeautee at 2:44 AM on Jan. 10, 2013

  • i think next time he says it you should go permanantly. i'm not sure how the lease thing for the apartment would work though.
    MooNFaeRie30

    Answer by MooNFaeRie30 at 5:13 AM on Jan. 10, 2013

  • No you will always come back to him. And he knows it. Sense both of you are on the lease. He can not kick you out. You or him will have to go willingly. Just remeber this. If you do leave.  Take your name off the lease. If you don't they can make you pay for rent or whatever.


    I would just tell him. When you are not fighting.  If you do not mean it do not say it.  I am getting the feeling you do not want me anymore.

    louise2

    Answer by louise2 at 6:09 AM on Jan. 10, 2013

  • Why don't you show HIM the door?
    ABeaverhausen

    Answer by ABeaverhausen at 8:34 AM on Jan. 10, 2013

  • My husband used to do this, except he always threatened to leave. He would even go as far as packing his stuff...he never meant it, it was a form of manipulation, to get me to give in to him. It worked. Until I told him I wanted a divorce, helped him pack his stuff up, and dropped his ass off at his mama's house. I left him there for the weekend. It showed him how it feels to feel unwanted and unloved.He also got a glimpse of life without me and the kids. When I went back and picked him up, he apologized profusely for all the times he had done it to me, and he has not done it again. We aren't even allowed to mention the word divorce in any context, and he wont leave the house to go anywhere (even work) if we are upset, he stays home until we both feel secure and the problem is resolved.
    Watch_me_burn

    Answer by Watch_me_burn at 8:35 AM on Jan. 10, 2013

  • tell him to leave before he tells you to. or end the conversation (maybe by going into another room) before he gets to that point. or leave and dont come back for a few days...that is if you want to continue playing games.

    if you want to grow up, tell him, when you're not arguing, that you are done playing that game and need a man who will communicate instead of threatening to throw you out anytime things arent great. if he cant do that you need to find someone else. if hes a good man he'll listen and take heed, if hes not he'll keep doing it and you're better off without him.
    okmanders

    Answer by okmanders at 9:12 AM on Jan. 10, 2013

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