Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

2 Bumps

Is love a choice?

I believe that this is true on a certain level. For example, when your child is driving you to distraction, most of us CHOOSE to remember our love for our child even when it is hard to do so. Loving family and your partner/husband can also be a choice - sometimes a difficult choice. But longevity in marriage relies on making a daily choice to love your partner.

This does not apply in domestic violence and abusive relationships - you need to just get the hell out.


Asked by booklover545 at 1:45 PM on Jan. 10, 2013 in Relationships

Level 38 (104,764 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (7)
  • A wise man, (my daddy) once told me, "you can love anyone if your put your heart into it"

    Think about it for a sec.... it's so true

    Answer by 2monstersmommy at 1:48 PM on Jan. 10, 2013

  • Yes,because I see love as a DOING not as a FEELING per se

    Answer by butterflyblue19 at 1:47 PM on Jan. 10, 2013

  • Maybe in certain cases. I will always love our children, no matter what they do, uncomditionally. I feel a different type of love for my Sisters that I don't get along with. I want them to be happy, and healthy, so I love them in that way, even though we don't see eye to eye.
    As for my Husband, I love him unconditionally, and intimately.
    I think Love is something you feel, as well as choose. It's taken me a long time to figure it out... At least I think I have...

    Answer by MrsLeftlane at 1:51 PM on Jan. 10, 2013

  • No. I don't believe it is a choice. I believe it is just another feeling that a person cannot help.

    Answer by SuperrMommyy at 1:45 PM on Jan. 10, 2013

  • I suppose falling in love may not be a choice, but staying that way, and staying together year after year, definitely is. It takes active work a lot of times, a positive decision to put in the effort that makes love happen.

    Answer by Ballad at 1:57 PM on Jan. 10, 2013

  • I believe it's both a choice and a feeling. Sometimes both factors are on the same page and sometimes they're at odds. You can choose to love someone that doesn't choose to love you back. You can feel unloved even though another person says that they love you (because your definitions of how love is expressed may differ). You can allow yourself to fall in and out of love. You could begin to fall in love with someone but end it once you find out he's married. Nothing is forcing you one way or the other. You can feel like wanting to hurt someone when you're angry but you make a choice to walk away instead. No matter how strong the feeling, you always have a choice.

    Answer by hellokittykat at 8:55 PM on Jan. 11, 2013

  • Yes. So is anger, resentment, and so on and so forth. It is emotion, and while some may manifest themselves more readily than others it is our choice which emotions we let dictate our lives.

    Answer by KristiS11384 at 1:57 PM on Jan. 10, 2013