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Spinoff: School shootings: what, if anything, are you telling your kids?

Here is what I'm wondering: there are going to be more shootings so at what point do we have to discuss some variation of this with our kids, especially the elementary aged kids? I am curious what you and your husbands have decided to do in your family?

We touched on Sandy Hook in our family but in no way did I give details. But, now I'm wondering what to say to them so that they can make an effort to ensure their own safety? Thing is, you never know how the adult in the room is going to act under stress and there is never enough room in the closet for all the kids. Ugh...the whole thing makes me ill...

 
jeanclaudia

Asked by jeanclaudia at 3:20 PM on Jan. 11, 2013 in General Parenting

Level 32 (56,918 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (12)
  • I didn't want to talk to my daughter about the shootings at all, since she's not even five yet. But she heard people discussing Sandy Hook at church. So I just answered her questions. Yes, it could happen in her school but it probably won't. So far, the idea isn't very real to her, since she says she'll just run up and kick the shooter, then grab his gun away from him and give it to her teacher. Hopefully that's as close to the whole thing as she'll ever get.
    Ballad

    Answer by Ballad at 4:49 PM on Jan. 11, 2013

  • Listen to your teachers and do exactly what they tell you to do. If you see a gun in the school and it's not on an office tell someone right away.

    We also tell them other things that we hope will help down the road. Be nice to others including those that your friends don't like. They have feelings like you do. Don't call others names: stupid, retard, dummy, etc. Stick up for those that others put down. All this in the hopes that they don't contribute to another person feeling that shooting up a school is the thing to do because they were picked on, bullied, etc at school.
    baconbits

    Answer by baconbits at 3:32 PM on Jan. 11, 2013

  • Mine are older and their Dad is a bit of a Doomsday type conspiracy theorist, so...

    If the shooter is inside, get outside.
    If the shooter is outside get inside
    Never run in a straight line and always find cover

    They actually did a shooter lock down in my DD 11 school the other day. They told the kids to hide under the desks and the teacher stood at the door with a baseball bat.

    My 70ish yo Dad had a blast with that one. I had to remind him that hiding under the desk works well with Atomic Bombing Drills too, LOL!
    feralxat

    Answer by feralxat at 3:46 PM on Jan. 11, 2013

  • I tell them the truth, that I can not ensure that they are safe anywhere but in our home I will die to protect them. I told them not to dwell on it because chances are slim it will happen at their school but it could. We also tell them basic safety and to make sure they listen to their teachers
    funlovinlady

    Answer by funlovinlady at 3:23 PM on Jan. 11, 2013

  • My kids are only 5 and I dont need to tell them anything they dont know about. If they heard and talked about I would explain the best I could.
    LostSoul88

    Answer by LostSoul88 at 3:29 PM on Jan. 11, 2013

  • Honestly my 8 & 11 yr olds have no idea about Sandy Hook. They are homeschooled and I have not allowed them to see nor hear any news on the topic. My 16 yr old is in public hs and he knows of all the shootings. He is saddened by them and knows to be careful.
    Tesserae

    Answer by Tesserae at 3:31 PM on Jan. 11, 2013

  • Ya, if mine weren't in school, I wouldn't breathe a word but since they are 3 and 4th grade, we've had to say something. I don't know. Not good.
    jeanclaudia

    Comment by jeanclaudia (original poster) at 3:33 PM on Jan. 11, 2013

  • We're in Europe. School shootings are so rare here that I don't think I need to focus on this...
    winterglow

    Answer by winterglow at 3:39 PM on Jan. 11, 2013

  • We didn't talk in terms of logistics or what to do (such as, what to do at her school.) We mostly focused on contextualizing it, the issue of "why" (why things like this happen), what it is about, what is important in this world.
    girlwithC

    Answer by girlwithC at 3:50 PM on Jan. 11, 2013

  • If the shooter is inside, get outside.
    If the shooter is outside get inside
    Never run in a straight line and always find cover

    I admit, I'm with your dh feral. I discussed with my kids a little about trying to get outside regardless of what the teacher says...and then I felt bad cause I know if the day ever came, they would listen to the teacher.
    jeanclaudia

    Comment by jeanclaudia (original poster) at 4:08 PM on Jan. 11, 2013

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