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How do you handle your child being made fun of at school?!

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Hi there. My daughter is in the beginning process of being diagnosed with ADHD. She just started a new school and is in 2nd grade this year. She has been having numerous behavior problems at school and it sounds like she is disruptive and cant sit still ever. The problem i am having is that she is coming home now almost everyday saying the kids at school call her a nerd and call her weird and a weirdo exc. She seems to have very little if any freinds right now and i know a big part of it is probably because she is very bossy and really has to have things her way all the time. She plays better with younger kids that she can boss around. I just am at a loss as to what to tell her about dealing with the mean kids at school and what to tell her to get through this. Its just breaking our hearts to see her go through this! Anyone have any advice for how you handle this with your kids and your kids school??

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Asked by stepmom2B29 at 1:25 PM on Jan. 12, 2013 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

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Answers (8)
  • Contact the teacher to find out what's going on in the classroom and on the playground. Have they contacted you about any of the name calling?

    Answer by QuinnMae at 1:49 PM on Jan. 12, 2013

  • I would first go to the school and talk to her teacher. If that did not help. I would go talk to the Principle. If that didn't work I would goo talk to someone in the district office.


    Answer by louise2 at 1:58 PM on Jan. 12, 2013

  • Ugh... meant to save that before I deleted it- I just wanted to make one change...

    anyway, basically- kids in general are mean, unfortunately. If they don't pick on a kid for one thing, they will do it for something else.
    I would just let her know that no matter what anyone says, she is special and important and those aren't the kinds of friends you want anyway. I'd also tell her that there are always going to be people who aren't going to be nice

    Answer by charlotsomtimes at 2:07 PM on Jan. 12, 2013

  • I'd talk to the teacher. Find out what, if anything the teacher is doing about it, or if she even knows it's happening. If she's playing with younger kids, that might be why they call her weird or weirdo - they might not understand why she wants to play with someone younger. I would work with her on social skills in terms of not being so bossy and insisting on having things her way. I'm not saying the kids are right to call her names (they absolutely are not, and something should definitely be done to stop it), but if she can learn to be more flexible and open, that might help her win some friends, and if she can win one or two of the name callers as friends, they might stand up to others on her behalf. I'd also see about getting her involved in some kind of outside of school activities, where she could make friends and build up her confidence.

    Answer by wendythewriter at 2:17 PM on Jan. 12, 2013

  • Have you considered social skills classes? Some places that offer speech therapy also do the social classes for kids that are having a hard time. You might want to talk to the guidance counselor at school and get his/her ideas - sometimes they do small groups with kids that need to make friends.
    I'm not saying it's okay for her to be picked on. You should talk to the teacher and make sure she's aware, but there may also be some things you can do to make your daughter fit in a little better.

    Answer by missanc at 2:24 PM on Jan. 12, 2013

  • First of all, talk to the teacher and see what's really going on. From there you can talk to your dd about it and come up with a plan together on how to handle it.

    Also, I don't want to recommend meds, but I know that my friend's son had the same issues until about age 10 or 11 when they decided to try meds for him. It became easier not only for school work, etc, but because he was able to make friends easier without all the behavior issues. Sometimes treating the ADHD through therapy or meds or something else or a combination of treatments will help a child tremendously. So I would suggest that if/when she's officially diagnosed, make sure you find a therapist who will walk you through all the possible treatments so that you can find what works best for her. Behavior therapy can really help with ADHD kids.

    Answer by anime_mom619 at 2:35 PM on Jan. 12, 2013

  • As someone already mentioned, kids are mean. This is a normal process of development and it can be unfortunate at times. There are, however, options for you. I personally would recommend a behavioral development class. These classes are typically offered after school and the parents are there as well. These classes are to help the development of social skills with children their own age and they get a feel of how to NOT boss and how to play and socialize with children their own age.

    Answer by USNavyWife0330 at 10:33 PM on Jan. 12, 2013

  • Talk to the teacher. It will get easier once she is about 12. Behavior therapy and medications are the best way to treat ADHD. Also go to Additude Magazine's website. They have lots of great resources. Good Luck.

    Answer by booklover545 at 2:17 PM on Jan. 22, 2013

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